I recently stumbled across a blog written by Carl King about the phenomenon known as the introverted human being and it struck a major chord with me. After each bullet, I felt like standing up and shouting “YESSSSSSSSS!” at the top of my lungs because these points (made by author Marti Laney, Psy.D) are total home runs. As an extreme introvert, this is like sweet manna from heaven.
I was lucky enough to discover a book called, The Introvert Advantage (How To Thrive in an Extrovert World), by Marti Laney, Psy.D. I feel like someone has written an encyclopedia entry on a rare race of people to which I belong. Not only has it explained many of my eccentricities, it helps me to redefine my entire life in a new and positive context.
Sure, anyone who knows me would say, “Duh! Why did it take you so long to realize you’re an Introvert?” It’s not that simple. The problem is that labeling someone as an Introvert is a very shallow assessment, full of common misconceptions. It’s more complex than that. (Since Carl King is talking about it, it has to be.)
A section of Laney’s book maps out the human brain and explains how neuro-transmitters follow different dominant paths in the nervous systems of Introverts and Extroverts. If the science behind the book is correct, it turns out that Introverts are people who are over-sensitive to Dopamine, so too much external stimulation overdoses and exhausts them. Conversely, Extroverts can’t get enough Dopamine, and they require Adrenaline for their brains to create it. Extroverts also have a shorter pathway and less blood-flow to the brain. The messages of an Extrovert’s nervous system mostly bypass the Broca’s area in the frontal lobe, which is where a large portion of contemplation takes place.
Unfortunately, according to the book, only about 25% of people are Introverts. There are even fewer that are as extreme as I am. This leads to a lot of misunderstandings, since society doesn’t have very much experience with my people. (I love being able to say that.)
So here are a few common misconceptions about Introverts (I put this list together myself, some of them are things I actually believed):
Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.
This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.
Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. Don’t worry about being polite.
Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.
Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest. Unfortunately, this is not acceptable in most settings, so Introverts can feel a lot of pressure to fit in, which they find exhausting.
Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.
On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.
Myth #5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.
Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” They’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.
Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.
Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.
Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.
Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.
Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.
Myth #9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.
Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.
Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.
A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. (Yes, I reversed these two terms on purpose to show you how biased our society is.) Introverts cannot “fix themselves” and deserve respect for their natural temperament and contributions to the human race. In fact, one study (Silverman, 1986) showed that the percentage of Introverts increases with IQ.
It can be terribly destructive for an Introvert to deny themselves in order to get along in an Extrovert-Dominant World. Like other minorities, Introverts can end up hating themselves and others because of the differences. If you think you are an Introvert, I recommend you research the topic and seek out other Introverts to compare notes. The burden is not entirely on Introverts to try and become “normal.” Extroverts need to recognize and respect us, and we also need to respect ourselves.
-Carl
It’s so good to see introversion FINALLY being seen as a normal thing. I spent most of my life being pressured to speak up, mingle with people, make small talk, and generally act like an extrovert in order to be “normal.” Ugh! It’s high time introverts got the space we need to think, reflect, and just generally be quiet.
If you went by this, I would be considered an introvert. My friends always thought I was a little odd anyways :)
This list was like a compilation of perfect truths to me! I have always been told I’m an introvert by other people or those silly personality tests they give you in school, but I’ve never heard it explained like that. It totally struck a nerve with me. Thank you, for sharing this, and for including that introversion is not a PROBLEM that needs to be FIXED. Introverts rule!
I literally read this not even an hour ago somewhere on tumblr, and now you blog about it. Awesome! I did the exact same thing as you when I read it. This pretty much explains my life.
Some of these things apply to non-introverts aswell. I like to talk but sometimes I like to be still and think about things.
Oh and you forgot something about introverts and extroverts. They usually end up marrying each other. Every couple I can think of, one is an extrovert, and one is an introvert. They balance each other out.
This certainly sheds some light on introversion. I think I actually fit these descriptions better than my understanding (and former self-label) of being an extroverted person.
Especially the part about not shutting up when you start talking about your interests. Hehe.
It’s so nice to hear I’m not alone. Thank you for sharing this, Adam.
I really appreciate this, as i have always preferred being in the underground (metaphor). Adam, keep making music that i love, please.
THANK YOU!
This was great to read and I’m glad these misconceptions were pointed out! As an extreme introvert living with an extremely extroverted twin, it’s interesting to see how this completely changes our personality.
Here’s another great blog for introverts: http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-introverts-corner
And if you’re a fan of the myers-briggs, read TypeTalk by Kroeger & Thuesen. It’s a winner and you’ll find out so much about yourself, it’s kinda creepy (and good to know that you’re not the only one!) and how to understand people with completely different personalities.
Ok, I’ll stop rambling now.
I saw this list not too long ago, and I was SO happy about it too. There have been countless times when people have asked me why I’m so quiet. It gets on my nerves. And they think introverts are anti-social… I definitely like being around people. All I do differently is listen more than I talk. And sadly some people judge you because of that. But it’s nice to know that there are other people out there who are fellow introverts :)
Well, that’s a thing to chew on.
I really don’t know which I am, but if I’m with someone I like, like my best friend or my mom, then I talk a lot. Especially if it’s something interesting. But then if we do something like draw or build fairy houses, then we get really quiet, and we concentrate on what we’re doing. But we still can talk quite a bit even as we’re doing those things, so honestly, I’ll have to think about it.
The moment I finished reading this I screamed in my head “Vindicated!” I mean finally, people who get it; and they think I’m just shy or crazy allergic with human contact. This can be really hard cause when people label you as one, they’d think you’re weird and will just avoid you. So the ones that do approach and talk are the ones that stick.
Thanks for sharing :)
;D what an interesting blog love!
‘like an introvert, i drew my overshirt around my arms & began to shiver violently.’
can’t wait to see you tomorrowwww. x
It’s great to know I’m not the only one ;) Thanks Adam !
I think read this change my vision of myself. I’m not weird , I’m just introvert.
If I jugded myself by this I am defenitly an Introvert!
Good info. I think it’s pretty important to link to the original blog post so Carl gets better/more credit. Here’s the link:
http://www.carlkingcreative.com/10-myths-about-introverts
Thank you, Adam for this blog! Good to hear that I am not weird or odd. I’m just introvert. ;) Good to hear I am not the only one. ;)
oohhh, this is neat…
Some of those things describe me(I haven’t quite decided whether or not im introverted) but it definitely is making me think.
See you in Indy tomorrow!(Lord willing!)
Josh W
AHHHHH. yes!!! Introverts are finally being seen as normal!!!! Sometimes I felt disrespected for being the way I am, but yes! More people need to read this. Introverts aren’t what everyone thinks they are. I feel the respect already.
I’ve read this before and I still love it. Its nice to know there are other extreme introverts out there, I’ve taken the myers-briggs and am considered 78% introverted according to it.
We just need to remember that introvert is also a word and not to let other people define us and put us in the box of what others believe what an introvert is.
I wouldn’t consider myself completely introverted, but I relate to most of the things on this list! Extroverts can learn a lot from introverts, and visa-versa… as the great Jimi Hendrix put it; “Knowledge speaks, Wisdom listens.”
This basically just described my life.
I am in introvert. This makes so much sense!:) This was very interesting, thank you for posting this!
YES. (x10)
:)
I totally get the whole “getting exhausted by social interaction” thing as well as “avoiding the complications that are involved in public activities”.
I just started working at a job that is VERY people-oriented and it takes so much more effort on my part to keep up my mood and not get too tired or stressed out. By the time my shift is over, I’m more than ready to get home an spend some time by myself.
It’s always hard to explain to people who are extroverts that it’s not that I don’t LIKE hanging out with them and so would rather just be alone but rather it’s that I NEED to spend time alone so I can “recharge” as the blog post puts it and as a result, keep my sanity. Mr. King does and excellent job of explaining that.
Thanks for sharing, Adam! :)
I want to send this to everyone who asks me how I’m liking the weather.
yes! this guy hit the nail on the head. woo. awesome insight!
I`m quite sure I`m an introvert……And I have only found one other like myself……..I`m glad he`s my best friend….:)
Just posted a link to this on Tumblr. This is so very true about me – all of it. A very interesting read with some great info and great tips! :)
wow that was very interesting! thanks for sharing! :) im not an introvert but im glad i know how they feel so it will be easier for me to interact with them. :) i hope to meet u someday! see ya in seattle! :)
wow… i never knew what an introvert was… and except with 5 and 9 that’s pretty much me… especially #4. I hold my friends sooo dear that even though one of them has completely rejected me, i still care for her soooo much and i hate it when she’s hurt. really if my friends weren’t so open and bright (which is reeeaally an understatement) i would probably be completely an introvert. my perfect day would just be sitting inside alone, on my computer, maybe some video games, music, and TV. wow… i guess you learn something new everyday.
wow. i feel more at rest and confident about my introverted-ness. thank you. :)
This is so interesting! I am definitely an introvert while my husband is the extrovert and this article really puts situations in words that I have been unable to explain! Thank you for sharing.
I think I’m in between being an extrovert and an introvert, but this is completely true! It’s also very interesting, I didn’t know some of these things about introverts.
It just describle me. Amazing. And, if Adam wasn’t an introvert, he would never be the excellent musician that he is. Thanks Adam for beeing an introvert like us :D
Ugh thank you. There is far too little info on our uncommon breed. Wish people understood more why I walk off when it’s noisy! I just can’t stand the noise. It’s too much stimulation.
Now I don’t feel so weird.
And yep, I did marry an extrovert with an extroverted family… which means noise all the time at his house! (I get grumpy if I don’t walk away for a few minutes)
well, hey, these myths is awesome.
i was born an introvert, but, see, i don’t have to regret for the way i am.
and sometimes, some science research can make me bloom a smile for little things like that.
but well, i will survive (forget about that 25%), and i don’t feel like becoming an extrovert.
My parents always told me I was an introvert, but I have never read anything that defines introversion so well. I can totally connect with this… Kind of helpful in understanding myself a tad more. Thanks!
God bless!
Amen. Minus the first few years of childhood (up to six or seven years old, perhaps), I’ve been an introvert all of my life. I love it and I hate it for various reasons. Fitting in seems next to impossible in this “extrovertive” world that we live in, but it’s nice to know that we’re not alone. Heh.
Thanks so much, Adam. I’m an introvert and PROUD of it. Not alone…yeah!! :)
I’m one of your people too! I’ve read this post before, and I felt the same way you did when I first read it. Finally, I have a group to identify with!
I’ve spent most of my life feeling like I didn’t really fit in anywhere, and I’ve come to realize that maybe that’s not such a bad thing after all.
If you feel lonely, remember that there are others out there who feel just as you do (I know, I’m one of them). You are never alone, really.
Stay golden,
Justine
thank u SOOOOOO much for posting this. i am definately an introvert, especially to my freinds scince around them i can be pretty loud and funny, but the minute we step foot in the old folks home i start shaking in my boots…. or my tennishoes. oh and what made this situation worse was that one of the old ladies said that i was TACKY. and i was wearing an owl city tshirt:( any ways, thanks for helping me feel completely accepted and knowing that there are a lot more introverts out ther than i know
Oh my goodness. After reading every one of those facts I shouted “THAT’S ME!!!” I didn’t actually know I was that much of an Introvert, but according to that list, I’m the most introverted introvert that ever lived. I also had no idea that it had anything to do with your brain, I just thought it was a personality trait.
Thankyou for busting those myths!!!
Please check out my blog: http://orangeintheovercast.blogspot.com/
Hugs,
Madd :)
Interesting how almost all the people who comment here think of themselves as introverts….
Anyway, I’ve always felt like I’m boring because when I’m around people, even my friends, I have trouble coming up with things to say and I always feel pressured to keep the conversation going despite the fact that most of the time, I just have nothing to say. And then it gets annoying because people who don’t know me are under the impression that I never talk. Which is completely wrong because I talk ALOT. But only when I’m around people I like and click with. And you should see me when people mention topics like… ornithology or anatomy or Tumblr or musicians…. like you, Adam.
I don’t know why I’m saying all this when no one cares or will read this, but thank you for showing this to us. This is EXACTLY true.
I love how all of the people who read this blog are saying that they are introverts. I bet you have of you guys are just saying that because it “sounds cool” or because ” Adam Said it so it’s gotta be me”. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mean that in a bad way, but you guys are just like my sister and Justin Bieber.
Haha, just read the comment from that guy ^^ ^.^
@Abby:
Introverts do care about other introverts. That’s why it’s awesome to be one! :D
It’s the same with me. People think I never open my mouth but when I’m comfortable talking to someone, they can’t stop me!!
MAYBE I‘m a introvert~ I’m proud of my introversion when I reading the book~
And I whispering “I love you” to you now~
As an introvert, I can agree with this wholeheartedly. People just don’t understand introverts. A lot of people think introverts are rude and stuck up because they don’t talk as much. But just the opposite. We just have nothing important to say! haha
Now I want to go read this book..
I have to agree with Grace and I just realize that posting comments like this on Facebook doesn’t make myself an extrovert;”Oh my gosh,where did you get that?I love it,WOOOHOOO!!!”,”Oh my gosh,I’d cry like an idiot if I ever see him cause I wouldn’t know what to say,I love your post!!”,I felt like an idiot before because I thought I have to get rid of this introverted thing within me,but after you put this up,I see that Introverts are just like normal people! Thanks for clearing that up for me,Adam,you’re the best! :D
THANK YOU. AMEN.
i’m surprised that the book says that only 25% of ppl are introvert, when the number of commenters on this blog alone (small sample it may be) indicates that it is a wayyy bigger community out there.
I always got those tests in school that pointed to this. I always assumed I was a bit strange or just had high anxiety. However this explains me to a “T”. Adam, I applaud you on being able to pursue your dreams while being an introvert. I personally could not do what you do.
Also if I ever meet you it seems we’re both in trouble because I suck at small talk. xD
I have never heard myself described with such accuracy.
This is why I love you so much! You care about your fans and you understand them, not to mention the awesome music…and I LOVE THIS ENTRY!!! As a future psychologist it’s enlightening and as a mix between introvert and extrovert it’s comforting. :)
Wow, my teacher was just talking about the same thing today! I wanted to shout YESSS at the top of my lungs during class! And now I want to shout YESSSS at everything you just said!!! (:
Wow…. that actually may be me…….. By the way, I love you.
I weep, I cheer, I’m flailing about – all silently and internally and whirly on the inside. This might be the best thing ever written about me. Would you please call up my mother and read this verbatim? After 34 years, she still just thinks I’m pissy. She’ll be thrilled to know I’ve branched out and enlisted a spokesperson.
THANK YOU ADAM!!! I AM AN INTROVERT!!!
Gold. :) Definitely me. Things like this is why I like psychology. :)
THANK YOU FOR POSTING THIS! Finally someone is standing up for us introverts who aren’t “normal” to society, and telling society to give us a chance! I agree with 100% of the points listed above, and I now feel so much better about being an introvert! Love you, Adam! Introverts unite! :)
Its soo true and Im soo glad other people talk about this, cause as an introvert its hard to explain to others who aren’t but just don’t get you.
That is so weird.
I used to consider myself an introvert, but now I have absolutely no idea. I can connect with about half of those points, but make a lot of connections to the mentioned ‘extrovert’ qualities as well.
And so now I’m an introvert-extrovert. Or maybe that’s just called abnormal. :P
I am so happy to see that this page is here for me. I am a deep introverted. I didn’t choose to be but I am. And I think tgat those myths are just what society needs to see in order to understand people like us. I am a singer/songwriter/composer/musician, and I feel that people truly don’t understand who I am because they don’t take the time to know me. If they did they would see someone totally different than what they see with their extroverted eyes. I write songs that try to tell people who I am and they are starting to see me for who I really an. Introverted are unique, beautiful people that God put here for a purpose. And we need to be accepted just as we accept them. Thank you for discovering this book and putting on here. It makes me feel like I belong to a family that cares.
My eldest is an introvert. This list makes sense! As a parent I’ve had to learn a few things; when to push, when to back off. When she made a switch from private school to publc school I had to intervene because she had pulled back so much that she was becoming depressed. Time and experience have smoothed things out for both of us and she is coping better. Her college major? Philosophy, not a big surprise. Funny how her best friend is an extreme extrovert, though. Keeps things in balance!
I guess that’s why I got the nickmame “crippled” by my dear brother, nobody understands what you really really really think, or how do you think.
I can type a million word about it, but my brain has been squeezed to the last drop!!!! That’s what happens when you have two exams in two days in a row and the subject is “PHONETICS”
Love and Peace are beautiful combination.
<3 <3
You’re really like an older brother to me! Those points are so true of me! :) You’re not alone bro!
Oh God I need to sleep!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Being an introvert is AWESOME. You really need to read Dr. Laney’s book – the whole thing was an epiphany. If you like this list, the book will open your eyes even more and help you understand that your introverted characteristics are really blessings in disguise.
I’d also love to hear your take on what it’s like to be an introvert and an entertainer. As an extreme introvert, it seems like a tough job to me!
PS- @ Peppermint: What Carl King forgets to mention is that no one is ALL one or the other. Each of us has a little bit of introvert and a little bit of extrovert. You are not abnormal at all :) Take this test for more specific answers about your personality and to see your percentage of introvertedness/extrovertedness.
http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/jtypes2.asp
Hope that helps!
I guess I’m jumping on the comment bandwagon by saying this, but I’m an introvert too. In February 2010 my mom figured out that I have Asperger’s Syndrome, which kind of explains it. I was a bit surprised to see that you didn’t mention AS in this post, especially since a lot of the things you described also describe it.
Lately I’ve often found myself bored with society – parties, church (except for the actual lessons), social things and events in general – because everyone’s conversations are meaningless and superficial and I have to listen to them. All people talk about is the weather, what other people are up to and did recently, sports teams and who won, etc. I’d rather talk about deep things, like acceptance and hypocrisy, but if I ever try to start a conversation like that, the person I’m trying to talk to soon gets distracted by someone else and turns to talk to that person instead. I could write a whole blog entry of my own about how difficult it was for an introvert like me to be thrust into a world of noisy, nosy extroverts who did nothing but try to change me for the first few years. We definitely are a misunderstood minority, but I’m glad there are people like you who help “spread awareness” (if that’s the correct way to put it) of introversion. It really hurts when people act like there’s something wrong with me, or purposely ignore me, or call Asperger’s a disease. So much for their “social skills,” huh? :)
P.S. Maybe the reason why almost every commenter says she’s an introvert is that the extroverts can’t empathize with this entry and don’t know how to respond.
P.P.S. Here’s another fantastic article on introversion. I don’t know if you’ve read it before but it’s as spot on as this blog is. Just ignore the enormous ad at the top. http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2003/03/caring-for-your-introvert/2696/
I managed to check every one of those off the list. In no way am I surprised. But I admit, I’ve always wanted to change myself a little bit so I can get to know more people. But I’ve realized that I don’t have to do that. Thanks for the post! I can definetly relate to it :)
The concert at The Mann Center on June 25th was amazing. Thank you so much! It was so dreamy, incredible, and lovely . It was beyond anything I could hope, imagine or wish for! Thank you so much!:) (Sorry this has nothing to do with todays blog post.:))
THANK YOU. I’m an introvert, and always have been for a long time. I mostly consider myself to be socially inept, even when I knew I was an introvert. My parents (mostly my mom) just thought I was dangerously antisocial because I could only name one friend. -,- I just don’t bother talking to anyone who can’t have an interesting conversation, and this is mostly because nobody even TRIES to listen to what I have to say. They just stand there, unless I recapture their attention. After realizing I’m talking to no one in particular ._.
And I thought I was going to scream when you mentioned musicians and filmmakers. Adam. Two thing I couldn’t live without would be music and movies. I think I speak for anyone who is an introvert, when I say that introverts would be extinct without those kinds of things around because you’d be forced to leave the comfort of your house to get to them.
And seriously, there is nothing wrong about a 13 year old girl being an introvert.
It’s good to know I am not alone. Those that aren’t like me don’t get it. I rather be at home writing my book then at the newest club getting drunk and having weird guys hit on me. I’m okay on my own. This list is like my greeting card. Being different makes one unique, even if it means finding happiness in the smalls things in life.
The trees are my friends, the water is my muse, I’ll write you a story if you’re alright that it’s only us two that will ever hear this tale.
Around a year ago, I started seriously looking into personality types, and on every single personality test I took, I got INTJ (Introversion, iNtuition, Thinking, Judging). After reading my personality description, my whole outlook shifted. It was so perfect in describing my life that I found it both frightening and enlightening, and I began to accept the parts of my personality that I always wished (and tried) to change. Reading this blog post reminded me of all the things I’ve learned about myself. I’m so glad you were able to have such a fantastic revelation about yourself as well! I’m even more delighted that you shared this with your fans because all the comments seem to be coming from other introverts rejoicing in someone finally understanding them. You’re a blessing, Adam. Keep up God’s good work! :)
thank you for being an awesome person ! honestly, i dont know what id do if i had never looked up owl city on youtube after fireflies came out . you truly made my faith in god blossom , thank you , oh and cant wait for july 29, here i come chicago
I can guarantee only 10% of the people who commented are actually introverts. I think if you said you owned a blonde wig collection suddenly everyone would as well.
Anyways, being an introvert sincerly SUCKS. I read a book on shyness once and it helped a little. I am sick of spending my days locked up in my bedroom like a prisioner where the only sound I hear is a fan for hours on end. Shyness is killing me inside. Just thought I would share…
TRUE TRUE TRUE. :)
Sorry!! I forgot to say I’m so excited about the new video, I can’t wait to see it.
Did you borrow the car from “Back To The Future” ????
I love the irony of this. Some of my fellow introverted friends just posted an article that basically stated what you did. I’ve been discovering over the past year how much of an introvert I am. And I don’t have any problem letting people know, nor do I have an issue with appearing “strange” or misunderstood.
Being social is necessary at times, yes, but I get super drained afterwards. Besides, I love being alone most of the time. It gives me time to think; to spend a lot of time with God. The less time I spend with Him, the more likely I am to fall – which I hate.
I think us introverts have the advantage over others in life. But, don’t tell anyone I said so. ;)
TRUTH TRUTH TRUTH TRUTH TRUUUUUTH!!!
And there are sometimes introverts who don’t realize that they are such, because of the sterotypes. “But I’m *not* shy…” they say.
Thank you so much for posting this Adam. It really struck a cord. I’ve always know I am an extreme introvert even without the tests I have taken and often I have been made to feel it is a horrible thing that needs to be cured.
Even teachers growing up would complain to my parents that I was introverted and needed to speak up and be more extroverted. Why is there such a thing wrong with being a little quieter and reserved? If everyone was an extrovert, nothing would get done because everyone would be talking. ;)
I would much rather be home painting, reading, daydreaming or spending time with my small tight-knit group of friends than being somewhere noisy and crowded.
It was so interesting to read the science behind it. Thanks again for the post! It seems your incredible music attracts quite the introvert audience. Thank you for giving us music that speaks to the introvert’s soul.
Dear Adam,
Now I am not going to claim I am an introvert, because I’ve heard they’re fairly rare and I believe you can be a kind of combination (or an extrovert in disguise), but I do find myself identifying with most of those points. I hate being in groups where I barely know people and I can’t speak my mind because we’re still in that awkward small-talk stage, and I have a single best friend with whom I share everything, and I would prefer to talk to her than to anyone else. I also enjoy having time where I shut myself in my room and just read or think without having to interact with other people. It’s nice to be by myself. Anyway, thank you for this incredible insight into the minds of introverts, and for helping me better figure myself out. Even if I am not a true introvert, I feel that I will be able to better talk to one when I meet them. :) I cannot wait to see you Thursday at Summer Fest, I know it will be a wonderfully magical concert. God bless.
Love,
Madeline
I am an introvert.
And a PROUD ONE.
^^
i feel relieved there are people out there same as me…
(though they may not be really out, but inside their homes…)
YES. This is amazing! It makes so much sense! Who stole my banana!?
Amen. In every personality test i’ve ever taken i’ve been split in everything except this.
Too bad no one taught this to anyone in high school. lol
I’ve seen these before, and being more of an introvert, I find it rather interesting. Not to start an argument but I disagree with the classification in general, there is more of a spectrum… Some people are on the polar ends, however others fit into that grey zone between both, exhibiting some traits of an introvert, and some traits of an extrovert.
The world naturally wants to put things in boxes and generalize them, but those who don’t fix in any box often slip through the cracks. It’s often great progress is made when one empties those boxes and starts anew.
My best friend is an introvert! I’m glad I know her. ^-^ She’s shy to unknown people (like really shy). But once she’s comfortable with you, she’s the loudest and most talkative person ever.
Wow.
I am totally #3,4,5 & 6… (DEF #5!)
the weird thing is, i’m very outgoing and it’s easy for me to talk to strangers. People would probably never say that I don’t like people, or I don’t go out in public. But, I am clearly a mix of an intro and extrovert!
I value my one-on-one time with people over a large group.
I have to be alone to process – VERY crucial.
I hate being out with people if I feel it’s just all “small talk” or that I am wasting time.
It’s so good to read things like this that make you understand and APPRECIATE yourself AND the people who are the OPPOSITE from you that you haven’t been able to comprehend!
Thanks for sharing this!!
I’ve always been fascinated by the difference between introverts and extroverts and I really liked the way he put this together and made it easy to understand.
I’m an extrovert but I’m dating/madly in love with an introvert, this really helped me understand him a little better
No idea if you actually get a chance to read all of these comments — you’ve got an amazing fan club! :-D But wanted to give you a couple more great resources on introversion. The more recent stats are that introverts are really more like 50% of the population, but our culture is still very extrovert biased. And for extreme introverts like myself, I think there is a sense in which we are rare breed, so to speak.
Adam McHugh and I already tweeted to you that his book Introverts in the Church is another fantastic resource on what it means to be an introvert and how that specifically relates to Christian community and faith.
And finally, just this month there was an article in the NYT that is pretty interesting: Is Shyness an Evolutionary Tactic? – http://nyti.ms/jmK2bZ. Because of it’s evolutionary approach it talks more about how our approach to life is important for our species/society. I think it is important to appreciate all the unique things that each personality contributes to our lives together on this earth, but also as a Christian, I think it’s important to recognize that God created us with this specific design in mind and He has a unique purpose for each of us — for our degree of introversion or extroversion, as well as all of our other individual personality traits.
Anyway, I hope you find those resources helpful! This is a topic I wish more people knew about and talked about! Thanks for posting!
Awesome blog, thanks for sharing! I am an introvert too. Now I understand why I don’t like so much business but prefer to have time alone outside. I also do get lonely if I don’t have anyone to share my thoughts with, and I’m a very creative person!
thank you for sharing, Ad!. what that book had said just right. Now, i’m sure that i am actually an introvert. :)
Me too. Exciting explosions within myself when I read these bullet points. I feel like being introverted is negative, and didn’t know it was a scientific thing rather than just how I choose to act. So I’ve wanted to change and become extroverted, but it’s not natural I guess. That’s very interesting, thank you for sharing Adam.
I am totally introvert I fit every one of those bullet points, this post from Adam makes me feel so much better, that there are other people out there like me… People are always trying to get me to talk more but I can’t…its not that I don’t want to talk to that particular person its just that I can’t…its like instinct or something for me not to talk to certain people…literally…no words escape my mouth! So thank you Adam for sharing that!
I’m so introvert….. this post is the best thing ever!
Thank you so much Adam <3
i love this. I feel so understood!!
Wow its so funny how I realized that everyone else doesn’t think the same way, I being an introvert never realized that others don’t get so lost in their minds. (also i like the higher IQ bit)
Someone who finally understands….. I’m shocked.
Well, following that, i would have to say that i’m an introvert.
Although i don’t want to label myself that and become locked into a certain way of life just because i might be an “introvert”.
I believe God made us all unique, and we don’t need labels to define ourselves, we just need to know that we are walking in His path for our lives.
And to introverts around the world, when people say you’re “weird”, say GOOD, who want’s to be the same as every one else.
actually,i’m not an introvert,honestly..but the myths about introvert are soooooooo true,,,i have a friend who is introvert,everybody call her weird,rude and stuffs like that,but i don’t think so,so i hope she and i can be bff forever,godbless<3
It’s like you know me lol I’m the only introvert out of my group of friends (which I can count on one hand) and they can’t comprehend why I don’t talk as much as they do. But if they bring up Owl City, they can’t shut me up ;)
I love Carl King for This!
I love You for bringing this to Me!
and now thanks to you Two!
I just love Myself much much More!!!!!!!
Thanks. Feel affirmed and accepted.
So , now i know that I am an Introvert and i just love the way i am .
WOW! I know what you mean about this striking a major chord, this IS me! Especially #1, 4, 6, 7 & 9.
I’ve always felt that I was different from others, and they’ve often pressured me about it, saying that I don’t talk much, that I don’t party enough… When I was 13 some girls even got really mean, and they were supposed to be my friends. I never seemed to fit in anywhere…except with the few people that I love and trust and who do appreciate me as I am. I’m not into superficial, I like going deeper, even if it means being alone. And I’ve grown to be fine with that, proud even. It’s our differences that make us special, those who want to change you aren’t worth it, they just misunderstand you and the truth is, it’s their loss.
It feels UNBELIEVABLY GOOD and affirming to read something that stands up for Introverts and shows how we REALLY are!
THANK YOU so much to the authors & to you Adam for this! =)
Oh! My Friend n I have decided to celebrate Today, the 28th of June as the Happy Realisation Day!!! And every year on this day, shall we read these 10 Releasements to Remember this Wonderful Day!!!
I definitely am at least somewhat of an introvert, especially going by this post. I agree with every single one of these points. #6 in particular described me perfectly. Whenever I make a discovery or something good happens to me, I feel like I NEED to tell someone as soon as possible, or the world will come to an end. Or something along the lines of that. xD
Thank you for posting this. I feel understood now. xD
Thanks for this post! I ran across a Psychology Today article about introverts and it helped me immensely. I was raised with the expectation (both by my family and culture) of being an extrovert but I now realize I am totally an introvert. There are so many benefits to being an introvert, and it’s so normal to be one–people just often try to hide it.
WOOHOO!!! Introverts for THE WIN!!!!
I wonder if you can be a bit of both? half introvert, half extrovert, or more to either side? hmm…
I am definitely an extrovert, but that doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy being alone with my thoughts, I just love hanging out with people too. I have always found it difficult to get a long with introverts, but after reading this blog I think I will be able to understand them better.
Awesome post! I have a few introvert friends, so this really helps me understand them better. Thanks, Adam! I hope your tour is going smoothly, will continue to do so, and that you will shine God’s light for all to see. =)
Thanks for sharing this. In reading this, I definitely had moments where I wanted to get up and exclaim “YES!” with my fist in the air! It’s a great awareness for introverts to understand themselves as well as for extroverts to understand the way we introverts operate. Loved this post! I’m definitely interested in looking up more information on the topic. :)
OMG! I didnt even know what a intervert was… I feel ashamed. Its kinda strange but that whole list fit me perfectly and actually how I feel inside. I think constantly and never stop daydreaming. I never had had any friends besides my family and when I call someone a friend I mean it. But one thing is I really am extremely shy unless I get to know someone then Im fine. But it seems so strange I never knew about this… I have always been considered for some reason but I guess its because I don’t care what people thing but what God thinks of me. But whats funny is I often have about 20 tabs up because before I’m done searching something I think of something else to learn and so on until the tabs clutter my browser HAHA. XD
Thanks for posting this. I think I’m going to be researching more about this. :D
OMG! I didnt even know what a intervert was… I feel ashamed. Its kinda strange but that whole list fit me perfectly and actually how I feel inside. I think constantly and never stop daydreaming. I never had had any friends besides my family and when I call someone a friend I mean it. But one thing is I really am extremely shy unless I get to know someone then Im fine. But it seems so strange I never knew about this… I have always been considered for some reason but I guess its because I don’t care what people thing but what God thinks of me. But whats funny is I often have about 20 tabs up because before I’m done searching something I think of something else to learn and so on until the tabs clutter my browser HAHA. XD Maybe that why a relate to so many of your songs, they are so deep and there is so much to think about in your lyrics. Its like being in another world.
Thanks for posting this. I think I’m going to be researching more about this. :D
OMG! I didnt even know what a intervert was… I feel ashamed. Its kinda strange but that whole list fit me perfectly and actually how I feel inside. I think constantly and never stop daydreaming. I never had had any friends besides my family and when I call someone a friend I mean it. But one thing is I really am extremely shy unless I get to know someone then Im fine. But it seems so strange I never knew about this… I have always been considered unusual for some reason but I guess its because I don’t care what people thing but what God thinks of me. But whats funny is I often have about 20 tabs up because before I’m done searching something I think of something else to learn and so on until the tabs clutter my browser HAHA. XD Maybe that why a relate to so many of your songs, they are so deep and there is so much to think about in your lyrics. Its like being in another world.
Thanks for posting this. I think I’m going to be researching more about this. :D
Sorry for duplicate posts… My computer had an error saying I didnt post. I dont know how to delete the 2 above the last, or I would.
I’v been thinking but I still don’t know…. I do know, FOR SURE, that if a friend hurts my feelings, I’m always really, REALLY hurt. On the inside, obviously. I also have an introvert friend, she’s one for sure, and we have been extremely close. But now a new girl has kinda broken into our friendship, so I’m praying about that. I love her and care for her so much. We never fight and if we have different ideas we combine them. Everything you said describes her perfectly. I think I’m probably an extrovert, but there can be times when I’m exactly like that. When I’m with my introvert friend, we pretty much act the same. So I’m kinda like that, I guess.
This entry was extremely intresting! I’m very much into psychology (but won’t probably be studying that in the future, since itä’s so hard to get a student place here) and even though I uderstand that this kind of researches always generalize, pretty precise rough lines can clearly be drawn. Just reading this I realized that my best friend (known her for, umm, 11 years now?) is an introvert, even though she has probably never thought about that herself. She hasn’t had to, she has found “inner peace” in other ways. I myself am probably an extrovert, not that extreme though, but an extrovert nevertheless, and still we have somehow managed to stick together through all these years. It really is true – once an intovert takes you into her or his heart, there’s no letting go.
Well, yeah, I don’t know why I shared this with you. I like stories and I just figured that maybe there’s someone after my own heart out there in the crowd that would get some kind of pleasure reading this.
I love that you posted this. I found out a month or so ago about my introverted-ness in one of my classes. It really opened my eyes and gave new insight into my life and helped me become a happier person because I was aware that I needed that recuperating/re-energizing time by myself instead of constantly trying to throw myself into social situations all of the time and saying “it might be fun”.
My mother doesn’t understand it and always quetinons me why I would rather not be out with a bunch of friends than in bed with a good book.
I just came home from a friends 16th birthday party and I feel absolutely drained, and not from a lack of sleep. 8 people in a tent for countless hours, I felt like I really needed to take a step out by myself and go sit somewhere for a little while…
P.S I don’t agree with everyone who says that most of the people here are lying about their introversion. This blog post calls to all of the introverts who listen to Adam’s music and read his blog. I think Adam’s music connects with introverts at a deeper level because that’s what we’re looking for when we listen to it right? It’s directed at us and therefore, here at least, we are the majority consoled in affirmation that we are not as alone as we previously thought.
This was too long, but I had to get it out somewhere :)
Oh, and nice Delorian! ;D
This has me written all over! I’ve heard the word, “Introvert” but never took the time to find out what it meant. Now I know, and I have realized that I’m one of the fewer 25%
Wow I think I’m an introvert… Everyone just labels it as shy :P
this is exactly me!!! :) n i feel proud! :)
okay, see there’s one problem here. i actually CAN fit in at times… sort of. with my quit/thoughtful smartness people don’t really label me as shy, just there. i’m the kid who usually knows the answer and sits on that side of the room. maybe my school is just different or maybe everyone is used to me being like that, seeing as i’ve known most of the people in my class since elementary school.
wow even as an introvert i type a lot :P
Every single thing here is true o.o
Extroverts can be so incredibly close-minded. They should all read this, and -learn-! :-:
And, uh, I’m glad to be one of your people c:
YES!!! I am actually from THIS planet!!! I am not the only one! You just made my day Adam, especially with the thought that I am one of ‘your’ people :) :)
all of these items are so true, and I felt so touched with the part that says that we can end up hating ourselves, sometimes I get so angry because I am different, but now I realise that there’s noything wrong with that. Another part I really loved is when it say that we don’t have fix ourselves. I am so sick of people telling me I should change. Why? Why do I have to change? Why do I have to be the wat they want?
I am sharing this with as many people as I can. They need to know we are as normal as they are!
Thank you so much Adam!
Then I suppose I am an Introvert. I’m going to go research this. Thanks for posting.
It’s amazing how much all these things describe me. I always thought I was a little introverted, but never to that extent. The only one i had trouble with was the adrenaline junky. I love doing crazy dangerous stuff, but usually only when a friend is willing to do it with me. This is kinda cool! Thank you Adam! :)
I wish all the introverts here would stop making the extorverts feel bad that they’re not introverts.My sister just laughed in her sleep!!!!!
“P.S I don’t agree with everyone who says that most of the people here are lying about their introversion. This blog post calls to all of the introverts who listen to Adam’s music and read his blog. I think Adam’s music connects with introverts at a deeper level because that’s what we’re looking for when we listen to it right? It’s directed at us and therefore, here at least, we are the majority consoled in affirmation that we are not as alone as we previously thought.”
My thoughts exactly, Samantha! I also commented saying that perhaps any extroverts who read this can’t empathize with it and don’t know how to respond, so they don’t leave a comment. My comment was pretty much a novel, though.
Wow Adam, you inspired me to do some research on this. Thank you!!!
I don’t believe anyone’s lying either! :) Besides, tons and tons and TONS of people listen to his music. One of my best friends is an introvert and I’m very proud of her and all the introverts in the world!!
I’ve done a test or some kind back then (forced by my family due to some mental breakdown) and my family was surprised when they found out that i’m introverted. (maybe as surprised as Luke finding out that Darth Vader is his father…)
But i don’t get it. Why does people always said that Introverted people is weird?
WOW!!! This makes me feel good about myself. Shy old me!! Hey Adam, my name is Asiri. I’m from Sri Lanka and i really really love your music and your heart behind it. Also I’m so proud to have a brother who is standing up for Christ in the secular music world. This has always been my passion from my small days too. To try my best to be a light in the darkness rather just be in the Christian music industry. (btw when I was really small I used to plead my family to sing “all things bright and beautiful” during family devotions).
Thanks for the music Adam. I pray for you a lot and thankful to God for you!! I just released my first song. One day I hope make Christ known too. here’s the link to a song I wrote. http://listn.to/Asiri I know you’re really busy and you probably would never here it. but I really hope you do.
Anyway take care and be strong. Since this life is such a short time, keep carrying your cross for Christ. It’ll be so worth it when Jesus returns. God Bless you Adam
your brother,
Asiri
wow! this is so refreshing, it kinda takes the pressure off of me. it’s ok not to be an extrovert! hehe. thanks Adam <3
Practically all of the people who commented on this said something about them being an introvert. There must be a lot more introverts than they think! Or maybe Owl City has a very introverted fan base. XD Anyways, it’s very interesting and comforting to know that being and introvert isn’t a bad thing.
This was exactly the thing I needed to read right now. I am the only introvert in my family of extreme extroverts and it can be very discouraging when they don’t understand that I am an introvert. I printed off this blog to show them that I am an introvert and just because I am doesn’t mean there is something wrong with me. I think it’s awful that introverts are considered not normal and always shy because that is so false! I hope many other people read this blog so they can understand the 25% of our population that isn’t just like them. Thanks Adam! You are an inspiration!
Thank you so much for sharing this Adam! funnily enough during my speech and language therapy at school my teacher asked me to write down words to describe me, and one of the first I written was Introverted. I’ve always thought I was unusual to all the others due to the fact that all the other girls in my school would be social and go shopping, whereas I would rather stay at home daydreaming, doing my artwork and walking in the countryside. Whenever I have a conversation with other people, I feel like my Imagination is completely locked just waiting for someone to find the key of my interests to unlock it. There are so many other things I can relate to the introverted group and it makes me feel so much better that Im not the only one who feels the same when being faced with everyday struggles. Thank you! :)
I agree with mamp1. I am extremely extroverted but I wouldn’t want to be mean to introverts or to ask them to change. Everyone is different in their own unique way and should be focus on being them self. I have been labeled and thought of as weird too, not as the quiet daydreaming one, but as the too loud one who gets herself involved in too many activities. In the end God doesn’t care how close you measure up to who you want to be or someone else’s standards, he wants you to be who you are, because he created you that way for a reason.
Wow…this now makes me think. That entry just described me. Most of my friends are like that. Interesting.You were amazing at the Boston concert, I yelled “i love you adam” like three times.
I’m an Introvert. I totally know that. I thought that’s why everyone thinks I’m the weirdest little person they have ever met… and my parents always told me that when I was a young child I never really spoke unless I was asked to, and when ever I was invited to a birthday party I just sat in a corner.
I also find it extremely hard to have small talk with someone, I tense up and just end up looking down the whole time. I can name all my friends on one hand :) I’m not that shy, just when meeting new people, all my friends say I’m loud and fun to be around.
My personality type is an INFJ and I’m proud of it! I like being different than other people, being unique is awesome.
This was a super interesting read! Thank you for sharing this, Adam. As an extrovert, these facts were really enlightening for me- especially the part about dopamine. I mean it makes perfect sense! It’s neat to see how introverts see life/social interaction. However I will say I found myself relating with some of these facts. It just depends at times. For example, I know the majority of me is an extrovert but I have some introverted tendencies, too. I love being with people and interacting, yet I love to have my alone time and to look inward/ponder. I think it’s the same for many, unless it’s an extreme case of extroverism/introvertism (are those words? haha). Does that make sense?
Anyways, that was great. And can I just say I adore introverts. It isn’t fair that they’ve felt pressures of becoming more extroverted and changing how God made them. They are some of my favorite people in the world and there needs to be more of them. They see life in a way that is completely beautiful and I wish I could catch a glimpse of their life lens.
And it sounds like I am talking about a people group, and I don’t mean to categorize like that haha. I just wanted to emphasize my love and appreciation for introverts/those that are quieter because they are the sweetest people and best friends I have. Don’t change guys… extroverts like me can get annoying after a while… too many of us would be suffocating and no one would ever get a word in ;)
HA! This describes me exactly!! :D
Especially “Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.” Hehe. That happens to me quite often. :)
Hi OwlCity:)
I was very interested by your post, and so would like to tell you about a book I think you would enjoy: It’s called “The Gift In You” by Dr. Caroline Leaf. She is a Neuro-scientist (and also a Christian, which makes all the difference) whose book talks about how the structure of your thoughts makes you who you are. I enjoy it because she comes at the whole ‘personality’ thing from a godly perspective that’s really eye-opening.
If you get a chance to check it out I know you’ll find it interesting.
All the best:)
Who knew?! No wonder why i’m the one who usually stands out of the crowd, who everyone is “what is she talking about”-ing. This explains it all! Thanks so much, someone finially understands me!!!! I’ve been waiting, and now it came! Yay!
Who knew i was an introvert? Apparently not me. :P
God Bless
~laurianna
LOL, this is exactly me! I bet you stole my diary, huh? Seriously, Adam, you are amazing! Thanks so much for writting this text. I mean, I feel completely normal right now. I thought I was the only one feeling like that. And it was terrible because I was feeling so misunderstood. But I’m so glad right now to know that my idol is just like me. I’m so proud of being an introvert.\o/ LOL, never thought I’d ever say that.
Love ya.
@BruhUrie
cool! I always love your blog entries. I am definitely an introvert too. not to doubt you, but are you sure about the Broca’s area thing? because from what I remember from high school psych, the broca’s area is mainly responsible for speech. So I would assume that extroverts would have more function in that area… however i know other parts of the frontal lobe are responsible for decision making and behavior (check out the story of phineas gage!)
Hope you have a great day! God bless.
I could not agree more with this blog entry. I can 100% relate to all of the things you listed. I’ve always known I was an introvert, but it has been frustrating to try and conform to the world in order to have any kind of social interaction. I do make attempts (especially lately) to be more extroverted, because I feel like I do want to be able to stretch my comfort zone and it’s really the only way I can make new relationships and have a decent social life, but I wish more people could understand these things and work to return the favor by trying to interact with me in a way that I am comfortable with.
Phenomenal post. Pretty much nothing but excellent, well-thought out points.
HEY TAKE THE MYERS-BRIGGS TYPE INDICATOR! It would be really interesting for you. It has four letters that describe you (including one that would show your introverted-ness), and it is a really common, well-tested psychological tool to help you learn about yourself and how you interact with those around you!
Hey–I’m trying to help free slaves and help communities struggling with human trafficking. Would you consider throwing down some vocals/keys/etc. for a benefit project? It’s almost entirely vocals right now, pretty raw. The words are taken directly from Scripture, but made to rhyme/half-rhyme. Would you take a listen if I sent it to you? brunsonish@gmail..com~ My goal is to put 90% of all proceeds toward charities I’m already connected with but can’t give any more $ to right now cause I’m just scraping by right now.
Let me know! God bless you for your faith and faithfulness to Him and to those around you! Be bold in your witness! I’ll be praying for you!
it’s ironic. i hate to come off so negative and rude, but look at all these posts. how many people claim to be extroverted? i’m not saying the research isn’t correct, i’m saying that don’t feel like the most special person in the world if you’re an introvert. read all the other responses, and you’ll find that you can just be floating in a sea of other people just like yourself.
when people hear that they’re favorite actors or singers or musicians, etc., were nerds in high school, that person will look at all the minor, unusually weird or smart things they’ve done and automatically associate themselves with the nerd stereotype. the same for weird celebrities, or celebrities who were class clowns, goth, you get it.
you’re absolutely not special to be an introvert. what makes you special is when you develop ideas about yourself, and others, and the world that no one else thinks of. it’s when you create with your mind. being an introvert is nothing to be proud of. being intellectual, or immensely creative, or a completely free thinker IS.
I’m an introvert. This post means more to me than you know.
I’m really looking forward to the concert in Austin :)
Thanks to this blog, I just had a major revelation about myself! I finally get it and I am not ashamed to say that (according this list), I AM AN INTROVERT!!! I feel even more kindred to you now, Adam. :-)
One of my very favourite posts from you, Adam. (And that’s saying a good deal, as your posts are always a great joy to read.) Being a pretty extreme introvert myself, I LOVED this! And the list is absolutely wonderful.
Thanks again, Adam, and God bless,
- Joel
P.S. Can’t wait to see you in Chicago!
I just felt like getting up and saying: “YESS!”
For those who say they had never thought of themselves as introverts, but can relate to things in this post, or vice-versa, introversion and extroversion are two sides of a continuum. You don’t have to be totally one or the other- you can be in-between.
I have labeled myself as an introvert for a few years now, and had already noticed a lot of the things mentioned here about myself just by, I suppose, reflection. It was only a little more than a year ago that I suddenly realized that I was socially awkward. I had been that way already for quite a while, I had just never seen myself that way before. Then I thought of how ridiculous and strange I must look curled up in the smallest corner possible with a book at social gatherings. I also became aware of how I hate small talk and how I don’t like to give careless, expected responses to those dull questions thrown at you for the sake of politeness, like, “how are you?” I’ve realized recently that the behavior that feels most natural to me may come off as rude to others. I was starting to fear that I am doing something wrong, perhaps that I’m just being selfish or arrogant- that I need to change my personality or act against it for the sake of society and civility.
A little more than a month ago my mom made me talk to a man I hate. I don’t hate him for any good reason- I just don’t like anything about him. Unfortunately for me, he is a friend of my mom’s. I do my best to stay out of his presence because I can’t stand him and I know that I can’t say a civil word to him. One day I ignored him when he said hello and he demanded an apology. I couldn’t apologize because I wasn’t sorry. I can’t pretend I feel a way when I don’t. I managed to shake his hand, say I was glad he came, wish him a safe trip home, and mustered a smile to finish. Then I ran into the forest to cry and didn’t come back for 3 hours. It’s that bad.
I don’t think we introverts have it hard. Actually I know a lot of people like us here. When you choose where to go and with who, life is easy. And 25% is a lot of people in my opinion. Try to be one out of 1% of people while you don’t know anyone like you (in that one important trait) personally, that is a little harder.
Wow I never expected to be explained so perfectly with one word. If it weren’t for Adam I’d probably be at the bottom of a dark hole denying God. But since I’ve become very interested in his philosophy I’ve changed for the good. All I want to say is Thank You so very sincerely Adam, you’ve truly inspired me.
Hi Adam,
I live in Sweden and just heard Alligator Sky on the radio. It is the perfect summer song amongst all the goofy summery pop music that plays here.
I hope to see you in October.
Your friend,
Carrie
We were talking about some of this last night after seeing you in Indy. It’s obvious that you are very uniquely wired – *wired*, not *weird*. ;o) And I mean that as a compliment.
Thanks for backing me up, Rachel!!
Just so the Introverts know, We Extroverts are not ALL the Loud- and- Shoppy -Type. We can be the most thoughtful, quiet and interesting people, But we’re just not Introverted. For instance, An Extrovert could be #2 and#6, but not any of the rest of the myths. But, Since I’m only ten, I could certainly change as I get older. As Rachel Said: “In the end God doesn’t care how close you measure up to who you want to be or someone else’s standards, he wants you to be who you are, because he created you that way for a reason.” So if you’re an Introvert, please just consider what Rachel and I have said, and remember that everyone is special in their own way, but there is not one person in this world that is more special than the other. Or at least in God’s eyes. Anyways, ~Mamp1 (aka Maddie)
Hey Adam! I cant wait to see you on friday in Columbus!!!!!!!!!! I’m soo excited look for my Choco taco sign lol haha!
i hope that i am lucky enough for an introvert (you, adam<3) to consider me a friend:D
anyway, you're in <3
P.S. Rachel I am the same way as you and I had 2 summer camps in the same week and 3 other activities that I did ALL YEAR and I ca be VERY loud. If you ay something funny, I can Cackle like an idiot and scare eople out of their wits. Like my brother’s friends…. HEEHEE
Just like when I found out what avoidant personality disorder.
“Wait, so THAT’S what it’s called? I didn’t know there was a name!”
I’ve always thought I belonged to a rare minority. And I was kind of thinking it also included my owl brother. Now I know for sure.
Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaay…I think I’m a introvert. Most of these things apply to my personality, mostly the “Don’t-go-out-in-public-for-too-long” and the enjoyment of solitude. I’m very happy that my favorite singer in the whole darn world is JUST LIKE ME. On an unrelated note, At the concert on the 17th, I had my hand outstretched over the barricades the WHOLE TIME, wanting to talk to you or for you to at least touch my hand. But at least I got your set list! Also, if you’re wondering where that poster from the Florida show went, it fell on my dad’s head at the concert and he kept it. It’s on my bulletin board right now. I LOVE YOU ADAM!
YESSSSS!!! EVERY SINGLE one of those applied to me. All 10 are 100% true. Myth #6 is my personal favorite, because that is exactly the way I am (I have 7 friends, and I would stick by any of them through anything). And myth #5. I love going out. But I get tired and tired of it soooo quickly and then I just want to go home. And myth #1. Many people think I never talk. But dude, if I am around people I want to talk to and am talking about stuff I want to talk about, I won’t shut up. :P
Yesterday I watched X-Men: First Class, and ever since then I have been feeling kinda sad that I am just like everyone else. But this post made me feel special. 25%, nice. :)
Introvert and proud.
Julie :)
Dude, when I said all 10 were 100% true, I didn’t mean all the myths were true, I meant all the truths were true. :P
Julie :)
This was so cool! I think I’m a mix of introverted and extroverted.
Numbers 1, 2, 4, 7 and 9 are SO me. I act very extroverted around my close friends and family, and I don’t mind being out and about for long periods of time. I just don’t enjoy mingling, and small talk. They seem pointless and dull. Dx
Myth #7 is the most like me. I hardly ever follow the crowd, I wear what I like, and what’s flattering on me, rather than the newest trend, and I think for myself. I prefer vinyl to iTunes, books to parties, and I can’t stand Lady Gaga. :P Thus, I think I often get unfairly labeled as ‘weird’, when I’m really just an independent individual.
Thanks for sharing this, Adam. :)
-Michaela
Thank you for writing this. Hopefully this will open peoples’ minds and let the world know that introversion is not a bad thing and it’s a personality trait you cannot change. Unfortunately, not to sound too angry here, most people are not smart enough to have figured that out by now (present company and other commenters excluded of course). Everyone keeps trying to change me–my family, my boss (and I’m a research analyst–why do I need to be outgoing for that?!)–everyone. Everyone close to me tells me how “weird” and “abnormal” I am for being introverted. They tell me that I need to “get over it” or “grow up” or “not be so afraid of people” or “take a pill” and numerous other ignorant, idiotic nonsense comments people make to me just to force me into being more “social” and “outgoing”. Since when is introversion synonymous with being immature? Since when does it make sense to make below the belt comments to change someone? If anything, that will alienate me further!
This summary of traits and myths is great. I am perceived to be an extrovert but I know that I am really still more of an introspective person on the inside. While it is fun to be with people, I need time to process and regroup. These two “labels” describe a range of behavior. I just happen to operate in extrovert zone some times and in the introvert zone at others. Nicely framed.
Okay, I’m going to copy you and say, “YESSSSSSSSS!” That is me. That is EXACTLY me. I am probably as introverted as you. And no, I don’t hate people, I don’t hate going out in public, and I love my friends. I just need plenty of down time. Number 5 and 1 stuck with me the most. When you get me talking on something I’m interested in (right now it’s the Lord of the Rings books/movies), good luck on getting me to shut up. It’ll be a while. And as for number 5, I do enjoy going places and experiencing things, but I get tired of being out faster than anyone I know.
Thank you so much for posting this. It means a lot to me, and hopefully it will enlighten many people to the wonderful-ness of introverted people. That’s another thing I love about you, Adam. You remind me of me. Same quirky sense of humor, we’re both the same type of introvert, and we’re both LOTR nerds, which automatically gives you a high ranking in my book.
Love ya!
Rachel
Hey Adam!
I’ve never seen myself as an introvert before, but I have a lot of times wondered what is “odd” with me and have tried to figure out possible solutions for that. But now it feels like I’ve got a little bit of an explaination of that because much of what you’ve published in this post feels just like me. So like many other people here I want to thank you for publishing this!
I also want to thank you for your music! I have played All Things Bright And Beautiful more or less on repeat the latest week and it feels so good to listen to it!
Have a good time and God bless!
Jonatan from Sweden
Oh. My. God! I agree with every single word typed here…I feel like I need to print this and wear it around so people understand me xD
… so i take it introverts don’t like Disneyland?
When I was little I was very shy and now, looking back, was probably an introvert. My mom has tried to get me to be more outgoing and so I tried it but it just isn’t me and I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore. Reading through this list I see that I still have plenty of these qualities and I really don’t want to lose them. I have a very creative mind that I want to do something with and I realize that I shouldn’t try to be someone else who is more outgoing. I have looked at those people who have lots of friends and tried to be more outgoing like them because they seem so happy but it’s not right for me. Maybe I will get more friends but I would prefer to have just a few close friends who I can talk with and have them understand me and be able to understand them. I know how you feel. I’ve felt so alone in this and you have helped me to see that there are other people who have the same desires, even needs. Thank you :)
Funny, I don’t seem to fit in anywhere… I’m kinda both. I guess that’s because I’m of the female race, and I’m sure that there are very very few 100% introvert women=)
But I do believe each of us should try to be a little more introvert, learn to listen, think clearly, dream and not waste time on babbling. The Bible even tells us to not spend our time on empty words and conversations.
You know, when actually think about it I’m more introvert. Guess that explains why I’m a musician, artist, poet and mathematician=)
i love your posting adam :D
and i’m happy for being introvert
long live introvert!
Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.
.. is very true. i agree with that. and i really love you, Mr. Adam R. Young, as an artist.
by the way, Philippines is sooooo excited to see you again. :)
I wonder how many of the people who claim to be introverted here are genuinely introverted. I bet a lot of you just WANT to be introverted because you adore the way Adam lives.
I’m a sometimes shy extrovert. Loved this article. Love the blog. You guys are awesome. Just sayin…
So good to hear that people recognise the awesomeness of being an introvert.
I agree with Bethany Ann it really is hard being an introverted women, friends expect you to talk all the time and go shopping and really you just want to hang out and day dream or reflect.
Its also good to be reminded that being an introvert doesn’t mean you are quite or weird or socially awkward you just focus on the deeper stuff.
Oh my gracious this is such truth! Thanks for sharing, Adam!
Ditto, ditto, ditto. This is SO me! I absolutely hate small talk, and no one seems to understand why . . . explained finally!
My personality tests always indicate introvert, but people argue with me and say I must have taken the test wrong because I am not shy or quiet.
Whoo Hoo!
If Adam is an introvert, I don’t want to be an extrovert. I’m an introvert aswell =))
hi adam
are you reading my message?
‘Yes’ to the being exhausted after social interaction.
Don’t get me wrong, I love my friends and I can get hyped up, but I tend to crash and need to be alone and quiet for a couple of days…
Just takes so much energy to be friendly.
I think I’m an introvert .__.
I’m an introvert so I felt like yelling “YESSSSSSSS!” at the top of my lungs, as well. Also, I love your new album. Deer in the headlights and Plant Life are my favorites. Keep being who you are, ’cause who you are makes me happy!
Wow. I can’t tell you how badly I’ve wanted to get people to understand this and I can never find the right words. I’ll just have to send them this link. Amazing.
This was quite an interesting read. I can admit that I’d never heard of any of these rumors, nor have I really given much thought to the term introvert. But it was interesting to see life through your eyes a bit, Adam.
I’ve always been always been an incredibly outgoing, social, let’s have a party kind of person. I do notice certain similarities in my personality like keepiing few friends close to me, but that’s more of a trust thing. I feel a little horrible now, knowing that i may have upset some people when mistaking their inroverted personalities as rude, but I think I get it now.
Thanks for the great entry, yet again!
-Lorelei
This was quite an interesting read. I can admit that I’d never heard of any of these rumors, nor have I really given much thought to the term introvert. But it was interesting to see life through your eyes a bit, Adam.
I’ve always been always been an incredibly outgoing, social, let’s have a party kind of person. I do notice certain similarities in my personality like keepiing few friends close to me, but that’s more of a trust thing. I feel a little horrible now, knowing that i may have upset some people when mistaking their inroverted personalities as rude, but I think I get it now.
Thanks for the great entry, yet again!
-Lorelei
I am an introvert but I’m not shy. I love meeting new people and love new situations that make me stretch my boundaries. What I find exhausting is being around people all. the. time. Good to see the truth getting out there ;)
This makes so much sense. I can’t tell you how many times people have told me that I need to go out more, be more social, talk more, etc. My mom has even been bugging me to go to a doctor because I am, in her opinion, “way too lethargic.” I’m going to make her read this, for sure. It’s not that I don’t have friends, or that I don’t like to go out and have fun, it’s just too much for me to handle sometimes. Anyways, thanks for posting this, Adam.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS POST! I’m defiantly an introvert and people always ask me why I’m shy, (which first of all is the stupidest question ever and second what are you supposed to say to that?!) but I don’t think I’m super shy, I am quiet, and shy at times. But if people talk to me I’ll talk back. I don’t know, people just don’t understand. Which this also explains how I enjoy staying home, I never related to my introvertedness… But it makes sense now…. Anyways thanks again for posting this!!
YESSSSSSSS!!! YESSS!!! *STANDS UP POINTS AT THE MONITOR* YEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!! *smile reaching my nape*
i have been trying to figure out what a introvert ment and then i kinda finally found out and i was like thats so me i mean im really shy around people at my youthgroup i tell myself i will not be so shy and talk to people but it never seems to happen and im really hyper and not shy around my close friends and family because i’ve know them like forever but other people its really hard to talk to them.
continuation of my above post: i have this friend she lives next door to me and she is so hyper and outgoing that when im around her im like that to we get so hyper sometimes that we act weird, there was this one time we both went to a event at my youth group and becuase she was there i wasn’t so shy.
Absolutely brilliant! I’ve always known I’m an introvert, and I’ve always been aware of it. But this article kinda puts it all into words. Haven’t been able to explain it before. So, thanks for a great article, Adam! :)
Love this post. I can really relate to the social media part. Great article.
I read my friend this article and I didn’t say anything about my theory so I could see what she thought. She was like, Hey, this is SOOO meee!! Every 3 seconds and then she would stop at something and say ‘whoa. that is WRONG.’ When we came to the art about adrenaline junkies she highlighted it and started cackling, because she is in track and she loves running and playing and jumping around and playing certain sports. I do not like running as much as her or certain sports, But we both HATE noise with a capital H. Especially the kind of stuff you hear at the fourth of July here in Greeley when the finale is 30 fire trucks all honking their horns at you and people screaming and little kids crying because of the loudness. I also love daydreaming and reading and sometimes wake up at the crack o’ dawn so I make some tea and sit alone for a loooooonng time. And maybe write a few pages in my diary. I don’t know what happened, but I used to talk too loud and my mom used to always tell me to please speak quieter and now I apparently never talk loud enough. So I think I’m half- and – half at the moment, like that girl said some length above me. -M
GAAAAAH!!! Everything you’ve listed there is just perfect!!! I’ve never had introversion explained to me like that, but everything that doctor had point out was absolutely 100% correct about myself.
I’ve been trying to push myself to associate myself more with the people around me, forcing myself to make small talk with everyone. Though honestly… sometimes it’s like pushing a rope. It just doesn’t happen. And heck if I’m in some busy place surrounded by people and off in my own world, daydreaming about… well, anything that’s captured my mind at that moment. It’s become especially difficult since my husband is quite extroverted, and has time and again put me into situations so I can mingle and meet people. And it just… doesn’t work, lol.
Bleh, anyway, I’m rambling. Nonetheless, thanks a bunch for posting this up here, Adam. =) It definitely helps explain alotta things and makes me feel so much better. (^_^)
W00t for introversion!!! >=D *goes to high-five you and all the introverts that commented to this blog!!!* YEAH!!
Dear Adam,
I saw you in concert last night, and it was absolutely amazing! You confirmed my beliefs that you are a talented, magical, whimsical person! You perform amazingly, with so much fervor and grace, and I was absolutely astounded and wonderstruck by your performance. The songs you sang were great, I totally lost it when you sang my favorite song “If My Heart Was a House” at the end!!! Meteor Shower was a pleasant and beautiful surprise as well. Thank you for the amazing concert, I will definitely be going to another one as soon as possible. God bless, and thank you!
Love,
Madeline
P.S. Milwaukee may be adorable, but you are more so.
How very interesting. I was familier with the words “introvert” and “extrovert,” however I wasn’t fully aware of what they meant or implied.
I read through the post and thought,”wow, that’s me.” I wasn’t sure how to describe my reactions to things before. My brother is an extrovert, and most of my friends are too, but one or two might be termed “introverts.”
I have now added “introverts and extrovert” to my research it list!
Thanks for posting! Very encouraging and profound, per usual. :)
Blessings and prayers,
Anna P.
I uphold this blog entry so immensely that I can’t /not/ make a comment on it. I’m sure that was the case with many of our comments.
I’ve been an introvert my entire life. I was born one and grew up one. At one point, it really started to bother me, because of the fact that there was so much bogus attached to the label ‘introvert’, ‘shy person’, etc., and in that way I felt it was hindering my ability to reach out to others.
Soon after, I realized that it was in fact not a flaw, and currently I’m actually glad sometimes that I’m an introvert. The not fitting in with everyone else socially just ensures that those you meet who become close to you are those you can trust and keep for a while. Even forever.
It’s challenging for me to remain in reality at all times, and I’ll often find myself thinking about things unrelated to an important subject matter I’ve committed myself to. I get lost in my thoughts, and therefore tend to be classified as aloof or spacey. Not in touch. Hard to reach. I guess it’s true in some respects. But it’s because there are other things that I’d rather spend time thinking about and creating. The reason I mention this is because people occasionally classify introverts as unintelligent or dim, simply because they don’t have that same interaction hankering that extroverts do.
I have one more that could have also been added to your list.
#11: Introverts are boring.
Introverts may SEEM boring. But honestly, some of the introverts I’ve met have been some of the most interesting people I’ve come to know. Not to say that I myself am interesting, but there are some things about me that therefore might come unexpected. For instance, I love bright (sometimes even blinding) colors, and I wear them often. Some may think that I’m trying to draw attention to myself, but in truth, they just make me happy. Almost everything I do or make with my hands is bursting with vibrant color. I love cutesy, happy things and use such physical objects of that nature to adorn many of my possessions. I’m quite a silly person, as well, and have many strange quirks. However, I do have an intense dislike for phoniness, and I do mind when I receive it, yet of course never let it be known.
Adam, getting to know you through everything you’ve put out here – music, blog posts, interviews, tweets, and everything else of the sort – has shown me that introverts can be beautiful. They’re people, who are just as dynamic and fascinating as any other human being on the planet from any group can be. You are just that. And knowing that there’s someone out there that I’ve connected to in this way, whom I feel could understand me – it just puts my mind at such ease, and I’m so thankful that you’ve come this far to share a part of your mind with the world. It means so much.
Best wishes, and good luck on the road! I’ll be seeing you in L.A. on the 21st. :)
Wow. This is the best thing I have ever read. Thank you Adam for posting this! Now I know I am not alone in feeling so odd whenever I am infront a group of people!
PS- Do you actually read all the feedback? Because that would be cool if you did. :)
THANK YOU ADAM YOUNG!
Hello…
Try searching “introvert” into google, it defines it as a self centered person concerned only with one’s thoughts.
Well I’m not really sure if I am an introvert because I like to talk sometimes, but I’m not really an extrovert because I like to occupy myself with my own thoughts… So can we say half half :p
BTW cool blog :D
<3
Hey any chance you can catch the Copa America (American Cup, I guess)? Your twin brother Lio is playing right now, here at home :D
I never realized i was an introverted person until i read this! I love being with my friends and I have plenty, but it’s that when i’m drained, i prefer to be alone. And i never understood why i didn’t want to be with my friends all the time like most of my friends, but now i realize why. Sometimes i prefer to be alone and just think, read, or play my piano. Thanks for finally opening my eyes to why i think differently!!
<3 Monica Jo
Sounds like me on a lot of points as well. I would have to say, though, I think it’s a bit more complex than what’s described above (though we’re dealing with people after all, haha!)
I’ve known I’m a bit of an introvert for years. Never really thought much of it, though. I also have to agree so much on the point about introverts NOT being shy by definition. Some of my friends have thought me to be an introvert as well and been so surprised when I suddenly start a long explanation of something 2 friends are arguing/”debating” about! :P
I will say, though, unlike most posters… this wasn’t as eye-opening to me. Course, in almost every personality test (haven’t done the INFJ, etc. one yet though) I tend to be right in the middle of everything… sometimes literally 50-50 so I can’t answer “what” I am. Eventually, I just said, “so what? I’m special. That’s a positive word, by the way ;)” – though how I said the winky-face I’m not so sure, as I was speaking… do introverts sometimes ramble and ramble as well? :P Cuz that’d be me… erm, moving on now…
Interesting to hear the science behind it as well (probably just fell for the “introvert trap” there, haha! :P ). I do have to wonder, though, if the pathways sometimes switch. The body is a very complex thing (the brain being more complex than a supercomputer, only question being to what potential the brain’s being used), so it seems somewhat plausible that that might be the case. Definitely would want to hear from a scientist in that department, though, before trying to state that as factual when I’m not certain and more-so just curious.
yeah, those myths aren’t true. some of them are not you, as an introvert. we’re happy for who you are adam, and never change it.
That’s very true what’s your personality type Adam I’m INFJ
True, true.. I’m an introvert myself. I just don’t get it why people think that way.
Anyway, can’t wait see you here in the Philippines :D
~Cheska
Hey! I’m Lorelei AKA GalaxyGirl. I have sort of a goal this summer, and as silly as it sounds, I’d like to have you (Adam) to reply to me! You’re an incredible inspiration to me, you’re my hero. It would mean the world to get to meet you some day, but fortunately you’re becoming more and more popular, and getting harder and harder to reach.
I’ve been a fan for about two years, I heard about you shortly after Ocean Eyes came out. I finally had the honor to see a show of your last week in Toronto, at the Kool Haus, and I have to say, it was one of the best nights of my life. Trying to describe it is incredibly hard, but I have to say, astronomically epic, insanely mind-blowing and magnificently jaw-dropping are all understatements to describe the breathtaking beats you played. You and your live band are very talented, I had a great time rocking out and fist pumping to unique concert versions of all my favourite Owl City songs. And I loved that you played the xylophone, that made my life.
I was so delighted when I learned you were a photographer as well as a musician, because that’s what I’d like to do when I get out of school, as some kind of side job, or perhaps even a hobby. But I’ve always been passionate about taking pictures, and I really love all of the photos I’ve seen. I’ve actually got about five hanging in my room, along with my Owl City shelf I made in tech class (Yeah I’m pretty devoted…..don’t think I’m weird!) You’ve really inspired me to save up for a better camera and start clicking though Adam, thank you for that.
I also really enjoy your writing. I’ve always been really into writing, especially about my life. I think my favourite entry is Hercules Goes Bananas. That was quite the read!! I also love that you can find a hundred words for just something simple, taking something so dull and making it beautiful!! I don’t think I’ll ever stop reading your blog as long as you continue writing. Please continue for a long time!
I’d like to say thank you for sharing your beautiful thoughts and feeling with the world through your photographs, your lyrics, your melodies, your blog entries, everything that you do! I can honestly say you’ve made an extremely significant impact on my life, and I would be so honored to hear back from you. I hope you somehow get this message, I’d be thrilled even if you just read it. I’m on Twitter as well, Lorelei Hoffman AKA GalaxyGirl, and I comment regularly on your blog.
Thank you for everything Adam, continue to be amazing! (I’m sure it’s not that hard)
I read this blog frequently but have never commented, but I really need to comment now.
I AM AN INTROVERT. Wow, I just read all that and never really realised what it meant. YAYS. I am such an introvert ^^ Its nice to know your not crazy…
And isn’t cool how its got the french word for green in it? Vert: green. So if i said Je suis un introvert its like saying I am an intro-green. I like green…I like intro-green even better. Soo…yeah, your music is good Mr Young (lol, everyone else called you Adam but I feel wierd calling people I don’t know by there first names). Its cheerful, just what this good, intro-green earth needs. Cheerful music.
Thank you for taking the time to read *bow*
~ God bless from That_Person_Over_There
p.s now that I feel like posting I think I might spam you sometime. Ha, jk, not really…or maybe…or not…possibly…
You should take the Meyers-Briggs Personality Test. I took it for an honors class my first week of college, and according to it I am 100% introverted. (I scored 30 out of 30, so yeah…) I enjoyed taking it, but then they had a psychologist explain what each of the dimensions were and how the people that had each trait acted, etc. It was very enlightening and I really enjoyed it! I highly recommend it! :)
It also helped me to become more confident in myself, because my mother does not understand introverts AT ALL and she has always put me down and made me feel stupid because of it. But after listening to the psychologist, I realized that God made me that way, and there was nothing “wrong” with it. Thanks for sharing this – I always love reading more about introverted-ness – because even though I am one, I don’t completely understand it yet. I will definitely look up that book and read it! Thanks again!
Keep making good music! Someday I’ll come to your concert! God Bless! Phil. 1:3 (:
being a major introvert myself
I completely agree with this.
I was just like
exactly!!!
Introverts rock.
Hey!!!!!
I went to an Owl City concert in Toronto last week, and I had the time of my life, literally. I would love if you checked out my latest entry describing the experience!!!
http://www.flyingthroughgalaxies.blogspot.com
Thanksssss!
Adam, I really hope you read this…….<333 You're an inspiration to me as an artist, a musician, a photographer, but mostly a writer.
Yes!
I smiled all the way through this post.
Thank you for sharing
:-)
Adam, you not only give me hope about the world through your music, but now you have given me hope about myself. Being an introvert, I always thought that I should try to push myself to be an extrovert (this has not worked). I believed these myths and they led to a decline in my self confidence, and since I expected everyone to ostracize me, I avoided them. After reading this, I realize that I don’t have to be an extrovert, I can be myself and I will find some friends who accept me as an introvert. Thank you for, once again, brightening my life and helping me to realize that I am blessed to be alive.
Reading a lot of these don’t really make them seem like myths so much as justifications. Number seven for instance doesn’t really disprove that introverts are weird, but rather gives a defense of their weirdness in going against social norms. I’m pretty sure that confirms it, doesn’t it? :\
At any rate, fun read. Fun to see all the self-proclaimed introverted people jumping onto this. Cheers. :)
ahaaaa!!! story of my LIIIFE!!!! this makes me happy inside :) :)
Hi Adam, Just to let you know that your AOL Bio page has your date of birth as 1969. I guess you might want to change that. Thanks for the music Adam. Really really love your heart behind it. Thanks
Wow, I wish I had read this blog sooner. I’m considered an introvert myself…Maybe not as extreme as you but people do see it and try to “change me” for it. I’m always told that this “change” would be better and it would help live my life as a teenager better. It’s too bad that they can’t see things from my perspective though. I’m around extroverts more than introverts and I barely have anyone I can relate to. It’s harder to find introverts for me. So thank you for posting this blog, it made me feel like I’m not alone.
Oh…My….Gosh….Am i an introvert????? I am not shy, i just like to be with people i know i can trust. Most of that stuff is like, totally dead on with me. actually, I think all of it is. I was reading all those myths and i am like, OMGGGGGGGGGGG!!!! :) Adam, you have blown my mind
Thanks for sharing this, I Thoroughly enjoyed reading it. I’m tired of people saying things like, “You’re clearly introverted… why are you anti-social?” Not usually in such an upfront manner, but I’m sure many other introverts understand. It looks like I’m 98% introverted… I say that because chances are there’s PROBABLY at least 2% of me that is extroverted in some way/shape/form, although I haven’t the slightest clue where it is.
This has to be my favourite blog post in the world, and I can hardly thank you enough for sharing it with the world :)
I saw you last night at Creation festival! So excited to see you in person, even though I was far away from the stage, and couldn’t see you very well! I thoroughly enjoyed the concert, and I hope that you can come back to Creation next year, I’d love to see you again! By the way, my cousin’s six year old daughter loved the concert, the whole time you were singing, she was dancing around, having a great time.
I loved this blog, it proved to me that, as I have suspected for many years, I am definitely an introvert. Actually, today I was labeled by my cousin as an introvert, and I wondered if she was correct, or if she just reached that conclusion because I hadn’t really talked very much for the last five days (while we were together at Creation), but now I’m quite sure that she is correct.
God bless!
What a refreshing article. At 36 years old, I am only just starting to embrace the fact that I am an introvert and there isn’t anything wrong with me. I am confident in myself and don’t feel like I have to ‘perform’ for others to make me feel like a valuable human being. And yes, get me started on a subject that interests me and I won’t shut up, but I loathe small talk. I am not shy and I can stand up for myself if need be, and it isn’t my problem if an extrovert feels uncomfortable around me because they aren’t getting the response that they crave :)
i am a chinese boy ,i want to say “happy birthday”to you!
Story of my life…. haha! I honestly don’t even know if this is possible, but here goes nothing :) My sister is turning 16 on July 23rd, and it would be absolutely spectacular if you could give her a birthday shout-out! She always says how entrancing and captivating your music is, so I know she would be astonished to hear from you! We saw you at creation, and I’m not gonna lie it was super amazing =] I know how busy you are, but I want to leave you with some encouraging thoughts! Psalm 27:13-14
“I remain confident of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.
Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.”
HAPPY JULY 4TH!!!!!
HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY ADAM!
I am probably 80% an introvert. My mom and older sister deduced that literally weeks before this was posted, and I was actually really upset about it, because I too believed a lot of those myths about introverts. I finally understand why I hide from the world for hours in my room, and than burst out needing to share everything in my heart and head with someone. Thanks much! Excellent post!
Hey Mr Young! Its me again, I have a request. Grow a moustache please? I think you’d look like Mario and I want to make sure…hahaha, I’m just joking… but I think you should seriously grow a moustache. Happy Spam day ^^ Have a great life~ That_Person_Over_There
p.s, I heard it was your birthday tomorrow so Happy Day Of Birth!
Hey I heard someone was turning 25 tomorrow…………..HAVE THE BEST MOST FUN TERRIFIC AMAZING MAGICAL MUSICAL MARVELOUS MOST FABULOUS CRAZIEST SUPER NINJA-TASTIC, ONE OF A KIND BIRTHDAY! AND EAT LOT’S OF CAKE FOR MEEEE!
@Tori
My birthday is also on July 23rd!! haha but I turn 20… Can I include myself in your request? haha just joking! It’d be awesome if Adam sent me a Birthday greeting..
Happy almost-birthday Adam!!!!
Thank you :) , thats all i can say after reading this <3
oh, God. I screamed (silently) “That’s me! That’s me! That’s me!” as I read along from point 1 – 10.
Thanks for sharing the myths of an introvert. I too am an introvert and I enjoyed reading every word and I agree with you from 1-10. Most people label introverts as rude and the way they judge them is totally wrong.
Happy B’day Adam. Wishing you more love, luck and happiness for the many years to come. I’ve also sent you b’day wishes on twitter. Best of luck for the tour.
My birthday falls on July 11 so don’t forget to wish me :)
Take care and God bless you.
Totally agree with Hanny :) Thanks for this.
Story of my life. Honestly, all of these describe me so well. Every single one is 100% true. This helps me to know and feel comfortable with myself so much more. I love reading all the comments and seeing that so many other people think the same way. The whole world should read this.
Thank you sooo much for posting this. It’s so true (:
“Those mean ol’ extroverts never understand me and now they have to RESPECT ME now that I referred them to this very informative blog!”
Introverts wouldn’t dare TALK to someone about being an introvert and the misconceptions, they have to refer them to a blog so they can avoid conversation about it all!! ;-) J/K…hehe…this was very informative and I’m glad I read it!
Sincerely,
one of “those” Extroverts
Thanks for sharing this… it really makes me think. It all describes me, though to a lesser extent than I used to be. I can play the part of an extrovert now, but it’s just that… playing the part. When I’m tired, I simply can’t do small talk, and then everyone thinks I’m being negative or I’m mad at them. I used to be way more introverted, tho. As I’ve aged (now a whopping 42–eek!), my sensitivities have lessened (I have lots still, tho, to sounds and smells, especially), so I’m not quite as introverted as before.
I’m thinking that introverts more easily communicate artistically. I know for a fact that it is easier for me to communicate w/ the written word than it is w/ the spoken word. Kind of cool, actually to think that it is the introverts who best record human experiences!
I’ve just recently (in the past 9 months) been introduced to your music, and I’m definitely liking it. It’s different than what I usually listen to, but I do like it! Thanks for the music, and the thought-provoking blog entries. I dig it!
I will confess this blog frightened me at first, mostly because it was describing me to the tee and I had no idea what an introvert was. And that is still a bit sketchy.
I suppose the first sign was how I found out about your music, Adam. I was walking in the hardware story and I heard this amazing music, but all I could recall was ‘ten million fire flies’, I had never heard of Owl City before. So I googled what I remembered and found your web site, later I found your blog page on your internal happiness and how you do not let your insomnia lead to depression, I myself suffer from unreasonable fits of depression now and again and so Your blog was a big help. Thank you, brother, I will continue to look to the higher things God has before me and count all else as loss.
Now I have been keeping a loose tag on this web site and yesterday I found this blog(not to mention the one on doing all things as to the lord, thank you for that one also.). So imagine my surprise when I read and find you describing /me/ and putting a label I had never heard of in use of that description, naturally I googled this too.
All in all, I must say you have been responsible for drawing me closer to God in some areas and helping me understand myself in others, I may be an introvert but I intend to use this tend to solitude to draw me even nearer to my Savior, I seem to need Him all the more as of late.
So thank you again, I would love to get to know you more, maybe learn a little about myself through the wisdom God has seemed to give you. Maybe we will meet some day.
I. .. am an author,artist,inventor, and would like to work on my own music skills as it would help me put some of my poetry to song. You have been very inspiring and I do wish you the Lord’s blessing. To Him, glory and honor.
Philippians 4:8.
– Exleston
PS. I will try and keep in touch. If we meet, we meet.
I belong to this genre of people and sometimes i think that i would get lost in this whole mean world. But days ago, i found a place to display me.
CHECK IT OUT – http://www.booksie.com/non-fiction/essay/serenade_willie/i-am-dreaming
I totally understand this! I am an introvert at heart, I’ve grown up an only child and am often more comfortable with myself then with others. I guess that’s why I embrace my job, because I work at sea with a limited number of people. I’m no social butterfly, but as a result I know myself and can be very self sufficient. It’s nice to know that there are others out there who feel the same way. I know what it is to walk quietly and carry a big stick, because there is a lot I could say if I wanted to, if I knew it would be valued or understood. Take heart, the world is full of introverts who are just as misunderstood!
Fair seas,
Angela
I am so glad you posted this. Perhaps I am not the extrovert I had always thought, but rather an introvert who has learned how to pose as an extrovert for survivalist reasons. I am also in love with someone who is deeply introverted and am realizing that I love this about him b/c he is such a deep person. He doesn’t have much to say until we start talking about our common interests – music and sound. And then neither of us will shut up, much to the chagrin of those around us. Sometimes I am frustrated b/c he won’t talk to me when we’re around friends and the other night he said something that made me feel awful. I realize that he didn’t mean anything at all. Anyway, I am so glad that you posted this. I want to understand him better. He is so special to me. And I am realizing that, though he is more scientific and I am more artistic and a dreamer, I am more like him than I realized. The Lord is teaching me to understand first before making a judgment and most of all, to be patient.
This blog makes me rather glad. Adam you are a joy to have in this world, never forget it! You have connected with more people then I think you will even know.
This is wonderful! I just thought I was a weirdo, but no I actually have an excuse to seem quiet and “introverted” :D because I can relate with all of those point :9
Holy Smackadoodles!!!!BATMAN!!!! I now feel soooo much better about myself….I love that you are so honest about being an introvert!!! And talk about a light bulb moment..I think I could literally feel see the light bulb over my head…I will hold my introverted head high and know that I AM NORMAL!!!! I thank you for this post…You TOTALLY made my day for the rest of my earth life…so do you think that our being introverts was maybe a gift from Christ?
Hm… I always thought of myself as extremely extroverted and still do, but after reading that i wonder which side i belong to.
I love talking to other people about whatever i or they can think of, either i hate being alone or isolated in any way and I make friends in a heartbeat. I’m usually the leader when i’m in a group. That’s my extroverted side.
But also, I hate letting other people have any control over MY life, I don’t follow trends or care what other kids think, i enjoy talking more when it’s about something interesting to me.
The weirdest of all:
I always feel like i’m stuck inside my head with my thoughts: It’s like i’m in a room (i imagine it to have an orange couch and shag carpet with words floating everywhere) thinking inwardly while at the same time i’m looking out the window watching myself live my life. In this room i’m exactly who I want to be, i’m skinnier and smarter and i’m not afraid of anything.
Sometimes i hate being trapped in the room and i try to get out into the real world. I try to quit thinking about being in that weird room and more about what i’m actually doing, but that only makes it worse.
Other times i like it, because no one else can bother me. It’s like, go ahead and yell at me, parents, but it really doesn’t make a difference to me because i’m just looking out at you through a window and you can’t get in to take away my REAL ipod for a week. (i can play songs in my head… like an ipod but not real sound just like, imaginary sound or something. They are like a background to my thoughts. The usual one is The Airway or Galaxies. :) )
And in my head I have these imaginary conversations with people. I imagine saying something and then think of all the responses they could dream up and then think of a response for each of those. Then when i actually am talking to someone, what they don’t know is that i’ve already planned the whole conversation. It’s kind of fun.
I can talk to my friends in there but it’s more fun and challenging to talk to people i don’t know, like you haha or the president or the mail person.
Talking to god is a whole different thing because i can’t plan those conversations because i never know what the response will be or where i will find it. I say things like, “hey check it out i learned __________! thanks for helping me out with that.” or “make sure my sister has a good day” and that kind of thing.
And at the same time as i’m talking as fast as i can to as many people as i can get to listen, i’m thinking really deep important thoughts in that room. I multitask, i guess. Ideas fly in and out of my mind almost too fast for me to remember them let alone make them happen.
I stay up reading or listening to music until around three in the morning, then i lie awake trying to remember the day that just happened for aroung two hours before i finally fall asleep. I get woken up before i get the chance to dream anything most of the time but when i do dream, it’s usually something really crazy and usually having to do with flying. i talk too fast for most people to understand and i’m very hyper. Maybe it’s the bad case of ADHD that i have.
I am an adrenaline junkie and i love thrill rides and anything dangerous and anything that makes my heart beat fast. one of these occasions was when I was at your concert in detroit a few days ago. it seemed to last for hours while i was there and then when it was over it was like it was two minutes long. I was in the second/third row, behind the girl waving the sandwich and i had a huge lilac bow in my hair that, now that i think of it, was pretty ridiculous.
So, i still cant decide whether im an introvert or an extrovert. It seems like the introvert stuff is harder to describe than the extrovert stuff. maybe being an extrovert is easier. idk. maybe i’m an ixtrovert or an entrovert. i think ixtrovert sounds cooler though, i think i’ll be that.
so,
anybody with ideas, please tell me what you think :)
my email is laudenclear@gmail.com
holy schmoly that was longer than i thought it would be :3
A world without people who like to reflect upon stuff would be so dull.
That part of us not shutting up about things we consider interesting is SO true =D
Wow, this definitely describes me!
Nice.
I consider myself blessed that my parents, who are introverts, see nothing wrong with being one, and have taught me how to use it properly.
Another fun fact: it is possible to be an introvert with AD/HD. It’s just harder to catch. As kids, we’re daydreamers instead of spazzes. Who notices daydreamers? And the meds don’t change that: if anything, we just daydream more productively.
We are so not shy, are we? I wonder how many musicians who perform live onstage are introverts? I’m a soprano, I’ve sung solos in front of thousands, it just so happens that when it’s over, I’d really prefer to go back to my room!
great article. It tells the truth! and the logic behind how we operate.
this post desrcibes my life perfectly, and i get migraines pretty often. one of the major triggers for my migraines is prolonged social situations such as parties, concerts etc.. i am curious if the dopamine levels in the braine are related to the migraines. i am curious if any other introverts out there have experienced similar results from high stress situations.
I read this article to better understand a very dear friend who would be considered introverted. I actually could relate to many aspects of the article myself, although most of my friends would term me an introvert. On the flip side there are parts of this article that are reductionistic and short sighted (especially in regard to how relationships work – there is always a give and take) and I found some comments to be arrogant (it seemed intentionally so). I greatly value all my friends, introverted, extroverted and somwhere in between. It’s equally wrong for an introvert to be so quiet they make the people around them feel like they have to keep talking or it will get weird as it is for an extrovert to avoid someone because their uncomfortable with a little silence. A myth about extroverts: They like to talk all the time. Extroverts like to sit and listen but when the other party barely speaks, they begin to feel a great deal of pressure to make a conversation happen. They might even keep babbling on not because they want to speak but because they feel cornered by silence. There is a give and take, a meeting in the middle or there will be no friendship.
Have you taken a personality test? I’d be interested to find out what you are.
(:
I think he’s an INFP. I made a comment about it and included a link to an essay on it so it didn’t show up…but you can google “INFP” and I think that describes Adam pretty well. :)
Did you now?
I had no idea you were a stumbler!
As it so happens, I stumbled upon this article a couple days ago. Though it was quite lovely reading it again.
Don’t you just love Stumble Upon?
It’s pretty beast. :)
Pleasantly Surprised,
Kalani
every ‘myth busted’ section i read, i smiled. that just describes me so perfectly. my friends have always said i was introverted, and so now i have proof! :]
and in reply to eric, who get headaches a lot from social events, i also get lots of headaches+i hate them because they are sometimes dehabilitating and always last a long time. they just come randomly for me though.
So interesting. Clears up a lot of things about me who loves to curl up at home with a book (or read things like this on the internet!). I’m reading (studying actually) a book called “Everybody’s Normal Till You Get to Know Them” and the author points out that we’re all different but some are just better at hiding what they consider to be their “faults” so they look like what they think “normal” is. So glad we’re brought into the fold here!
I’ve always wondered why I was diffrent from everyone. Now I found out im 70% introvert or an ambivert. Clears up a lot of things about me.
man, adam, this is amazing. i think most of your fans are introverts, dude! this is just awesome, i felt like i read a summary of me. you know your stuff carl
From what I’m reading i am a complete introvert. Every single thing i can relate to. Thanks for posting that! :3 -Madison
I’m an introvert and I have a very very very extroverted little sister. Aside from that, alot of the people I hang with at school are extroverts, and they don’t really talk to me in particular, so usually at school i don’t really say much and then I come home and talk and talk and talk about what happened that day. Then my extremely extroverted sister needs more than her fair share of spot-light and starts butting in on my stories and conversations. I totally get it now. My sis doesn’t get how I think. Neither do most of my ‘friends’ at school. Posting this around to all my friends and family…
Thank you for posting this, Adam! It explains and takes a stance for all of us who are introverts :)
Hi Adam, Good post and I agree with all the myths mentioned by you. Looking forward to seeing you perform live in Kansas City next week! Take care!
This described me well. Even before this, I didn’t think I was an introvert, I knew I was an introvert. And I’m rather proud of it. Normal is not something I’d morally want to be nowadays. Go Introverts!
-Mia (Bazooka)
wow! love this post! thankyou post posting adam! have any link for the original post by carl king, at least anyone?…
Thankyou so much for posting this. It was really incredibly enlightening for me, because for many years, ofcourse I have known and tried to understand the difficulties that I have with certain social situations and people, but not until I read this article did I fully realize that I am actually, indeed, an ‘introvert’. It’s refreshing in a way to have a sort of ‘label’ for oneself. Like some of the former comments have said, each and every one of the myths or ‘points’ made, hit me like a sack of bricks and after reading each one I thought to myself “wow…that..is..me, I am an introvert.” =-/
danke schoen. =)
Thank you so much for posting this. I agree with you. I was like “THAT IS TOTALLY ME!!!” after every one of the points he made. I am often looked down upon because I don’t socialize like everyone else. People think I’m snobby or strange because I don’t interact the same. It’s not that I don’t want to interact, I just don’t know how to do it like them. I have often felt terrible because I’m not like other people. Thank you for posting this. It has given me a small ray of hope. I can be me and it’s not wrong.
~PEACE & GRACE~
WOW! This is so me! I always knew it, but this confirms it!
I wish this was on Facebook so i could ‘Like’ it. totally me.
I LOVE this list! I am an introvert and many of these struck a cord with me. I wish everyone had this list to refer to when I’m around…just so they know:)
I am going to start permanently carrying this around in my pocket. This explains so much. Now I understand myself a whole lot better. Thanks, Adam!
If i know you then you would never believe i am an introvert but stick me a room of people i do not know then you can easily see. I really love being introverted because you can think and its just awesome and i also love my insomnia because i lay there and think
Omg, I think I’m an introvert
Just yesturday I was wondering why I was so different from everyone else and it was really getting me down, like it often does. After reading this I now have a positive way to look the way I am. Its so nice to know I’m not the only one. Thank you Adam! :)
This really made me think a lot. I’ve always been ashamed of being an introvert because I didn’t feel like people accepted me. I might go get this book now. It describes just how I feel. Thanks Adam!
Your fellow tiny town Minnesotan,
Kristen
this is refreshing and makes me chuckle.
I dont have aenough words to thank you for sharing this in such a sincere and natural way, since you also talked about your personal life. <3 I love you even more for that, Adam.
I don’t consider myself an introvert, or an extrovert, but I am really shy. At least, around people I don’t know. *pokes another quote* “People don’t know me think I’m quiet. People who know me wish I was.” I can feel really awkward around people if they’re talking about stuff like…idk. Fancy clothes and this and that make me feel really uncomfortable and awkward but get me started on dogs and well. XDD
Introvert..it’s so me..hahaha…
thank’s for sharing
God Bless You ^__^
My family of 7 has 5 introverts who all like your music! My daughter introduced us to it. I hope you make it to her college sometime–Houghton College, a small Christian college in New York State. Four of them enjoyed your show at Creation!
I think this changed my life. And I mean that in complete sincerity.
Sounds like introverts are basically the glue that holds the world together. Too bad everyone isn’t an introvert…oh wait…everyone is (if you go by the blog posts). The article maintains that introverts are misrepresented and painted with a broad brush, and fixes the problem by doing the same to extroverts.
I love this! I’m glad that someone is speaking out for Introverts instead of against us! We are special and we should not have to change. God made us this way and He loves us. :D
Most of these I already knew, because one of my best friends is very introvert, and I’m about half and half (not sure how that works scientifically, but I have distinct traits of both introverts and extroverts), but it’s nice to now know the ones I didn’t know before. Thank you!
That list is the me that I’ve always seen but others haven’t. If my mother would have read this list 30 years ago my younger life and our relationship would have been very different. She always wanted me to be something else. Today in my life I just don’t care what others think of my introverted self. Most consider me weird and/or stuckup. But like the list said, my few close friends know me and know I’m not going to chit chat and fill the space with words so they don’t take it personally. It’s true though, once you get me talking about something I have an interest in, watch out, I’ll talk you to death.
thank you so much for sharing this, adam. kinda helps to know that we aren’t alone in our seeming social awkwardness. that what we need is in fact normal and necessary for many people out there!
I love this post Adam. Thanks for drawing attention to the introvert issue in such a public way. For anyone that is interested, I wrote a book called Introverts in the Church: Finding Our Place in an Extroverted Culture, and I also have a blog devoted to the topic. I have found that while our broader culture is biased towards extroversion, many of our churches are as well, and we even idealize extroverted qualities – like gregariousness, comfortability in meeting strangers, etc – as the true models of “faithfulness.”
Adam, this is very interesting… :D
The whole ten are valid to me.
This blog may have very well completely changed my 45 year old outlook on life. Thank you, Adam. You are 110% amazing. (Took my three girls and three of their friends to your concert in Seattle last night ~ I was blown away by your showmanship and how genuine a person you are… and that is how I ended up finding your blog). Wishing you years and years of success and fulfillment! <3 Will be looking forward to another Seattle show someday… I've seen A LOT of concerts in my life, and many well seasoned & world renowned performers – they've got nothing you you! Sincerely.
This is so me…all 10 are the story of my life. Adam you have seriously made me feel so much better, thank you. Once again, God bless you,
Anna
I was truely touched by this article. Thank you so much Adam.
I’m an introvert, and one of your people for sure :) (I love saying that)
There were times in my life that I was unhappy, because of the difference with extroverts. This article remind of me how important it is to love myself for who I really am. Amazing.
Now I’m proud of myself for being different, and also proud of being one of your people.
And I love adam the introvert, it is who you are that makes you so successful in music.
-lyla
Dearest Adam,
Being the middle child I always knew something was different about me. My older sister and younger brother are quite the extroverts and absolutely love spending time with all their friends and talking the hours away. I on the other hand am quite the extreme introvert and have two very close friends. However, that being said, I don’t talk to them as often as my siblings talk to their friends. I spend many days alone in my room listening to music, reading or daydreaming my troubles away. In reading this article I realized that, like many of the others who have commented, all ten applied to me. So I went to my nearest Barnes & Noble and purchased this book. Ever since then I have been on that book like white on rice learning all about myself. It’s like someone wrote a book for me! I think when I’m done reading it I’m going to make my family read it so they’ll understand things a little bit better. They do love me dearly but sometimes they’re just puzzled by my desire to be alone. Basically I suppose I just wanted to express how grateful I am at reading this. Though I did get a little long winded didn’t I? I don’t even know if you read these….but if you do, just know that you have made one extremely introverted college student extremely happy.
ps-thanks for keeping your music clean and giving all the glory to God (:
~Merry
Dear Adam,
For the most part, I get along with others. But the truth is, despite all the friends and family surrounding me, I’ve always felt alone. It was always strange to me why I felt so different from everyone. People judged me incorrectly all the time, and I eventually concluded that something was wrong with me, since no one else around me behaved the way I always have. But as I grew, I evolved. I realized that my individuality surpassed anyone who tried to be something they weren’t. I discovered I was an introvert amongst a crowd of extroverts who sought thrills “above” the simple life, while I found the world around me to be thrilling just the way it is.
Sometimes, I cancel plans with friends just to be alone to think. I enjoy my company more than a lot of other’s company, only because I am not mentally stimulated by those who are superficial and shallow (and these kinds of people seem to dominate the world today, it seems!). I’ve always been a hopeless romantic and philosopher of life. I enjoy the little things in life. I find myself taking in all of nature’s glories :) Words could never describe what I felt inside while gazing out into God’s beautiful world…until I heard your songs, of course! :) My point is, I feel a lot like you. I’d much rather be in no group than join a group of whom I have nothing in common. I like to be real, despite how others might judge me.
I’m glad I found another introvert like me :) Reading this blog finally makes me feel less lonely :) Hopefully, I’ll be able to meet you one day at a concert or the like :)
Thank you so much,
Chloe
Thanks so much for posting this! My daughter reads your blog and made me sit down and read this. Her face lit up and she said,”That’s me, Mom!!” She got the opportunity to see you at Creation and afterwards I asked her sister if she was jumping up and down or anything and she said,”nope, she just turned around and looked at me with a huge smile on her face so I knew she was having a good time.” …her version of jumping up and down, screaming!
Wow, this is so me. I think I believed some of those myths and thought I really wasn’t an introvert, but this totally describes me. Thanks so much, Adam.
Chris
Thank you so much for this information. I basically ticked off every box. While I knew I was an introvert, I didn’t realize how often I gave in to negative self talk…particularly about not having enough friends. You have affirmed that I am OK! And if I wasn’t an introvert, I probably wouldn’t be a spiritual companion.
This helps. Thanks.
Thank you so much. You are a life saver. I have always felt the pressure to “fit in” more so after I moved to a new city. I like being alone but people around make me feel am a psycho or something. I even considered seeing a shrink. Yes, I do have friends i can count on and who count on me. Am glad to learn I am perfectly normal and that I am not the only introvert.
I was just struggling with this last night, and wondering what was wrong with me for not wanting to be as social when everyone around me seems to thrive on it. This really makes me feel like it’s not a flaw, but just part of my nature.
Thank you!
OH. Thank you for posting this. I think it just explained the last ten years of my life entirely . . . and gave me hope for the next however-many.
I actually just finished ready “Introvert Power” by Laurie Helgoe. A very enlightening book for both introverts and extroverts to read.
One thing that she mentioned that conflicts with much of what is out there is that current research shows that about half and perhaps even more than half of the population.
The research about a quarter to a third of all people are introverts that people often cite came from over 40 years ago.
There are much more of us out there than we think! We just have to look for them.
Also a great read about similar topics: “the Highly Sensitive Person: How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You” by Elaine Aron. Good stuff. I finally realized that there was absolutely nothing wrong with me:-)
Dear Adam
this is my first time reading your blog, and i have to say, this is exactly what i needed to read. I’m quite the introvert, & people seem to want to “break me out of my shell” or tease me for my shy, keep-to-myself personality. But now i see there’s nothing wrong with me (besides sinful human nature of course).
Matthew 20:16 “so the last will be first, and the first will be last”
God bless you!
Also my first time reading your blog. I found you via another blog that I was reading for the first time.
Loved this blog entry and hope that many many people out there have learned from it. I bet quite a few “Aha!” moments happened. Not only for Introverts, but also for Extraverts.
I’m an Introvert and have know it for most of my life, I just never thought that my mind/brain was wired/set up differently than Extroverts.
Oh my goodness I found my whole entire descipsion its scarry
MYTH1: I don’t talk unless there is something to talk about then I just won’t shut up
MYTH2: I ya I am not shy I just wait untill somebody notices and talks to me then I will open up
MYTH3: I don’t try to be rude I find it very uncomfortable when I think I am
MYTH4: I have 2 friends that I play with all the time I like it better that way I’d rather have 2 that I know and love than have a bunch that I hardly know
MYTH5: I don’t like being in public places very long but I will go to public places but in the end I can’t wait to get back home
MYTH6: not always but sometimes I like to draw alot alone then show it to my friends I normaly long for the next day or hour to come so then I can walk up (one lives in walking distace) to their house and show it to them
MYTH7: I normaly get bored of everything else happening I normaly do what I like to do I think that most other people would get bored of drawing and want to do something else I just want to stay and do whatever I want to do and that sometimes drives them away
MYTH8: I am not a nerd but I do think I live more in my head than out
MYTH9: I like it inside my room or on the trampoline it is best place to sit and watch the sunset to twilight to night
MYTH10: I like being the way I am and that will never change and I will always be that way the loner :)
Emily,
YAY!! I get it! I always describe my hubby as shy… he’s not!! He’s introverted! …and alas… I am extroverted… lol
Thanks for sharing this!
This is so amazing! It explains me to a T, and it explains so many hard conversations I’ve had with friends who think I’m any number of things you listed here. I should just make anyone who wants to be my friend read this, and then we’ll see where things go from there, ha. Nice work.
Wow.
That was an eye opener.
I always thought I was just super weird and I didn’t know what was wrong with me. I guess I’m an introvert ! It’s nice to know that I’m not the only one like this and that I should just stay the way I am instead of trying to be “normal”. Thank you so much for posting Adam!
I didn’t find this until 3 days ago and I’m so happy I did. Since grade school I thought something was wrong with me, I’m absolutely relieved to know otherwise.
Hey, nice blog. Great writing style!
Wow, those are right on target. Especially the first one. People bug me about being quiet or ask me what I’m thinking about if I’m silent. If I wanted people to know what I was thinking, I would talk about it!
I wanted to throw my phone across the room. Finally, someone GETS it! This is true to word and it is exactly me. I’m still adjusting with the notion that it is okay for me to be an introvert, not going out all the time and having only a small intimate amount of friends. If only I can get other people, that don’t know me as well, to understand all of this.. It’s not a mental issue and I don’t need Introverts Anonymous, thankyouverymuch. I’m off to order that book and will spend a quiet weekend lost in thought. Just the way I like it!
Oh and nothing beats being an introvert raising an extrovert 4 year old.. Thats another topic enntirely!
Pe-e-e-ace to me! Want to send a copy to my family of origin (as if it could change anything)! Being a daughter of narsisistic parents has took a tole on me, yet, I am very comfortable in my own skin, with all my gifts as an introvert. Thank you for this blessing-Validation!
DAMNNNN that’s me for sure, all except #9, cause I love the adrenaline rush of certain situations. :P
Thank you! You got it exactly right.
I hope you don’t mind, but I am printing this out to give to my husband. Maybe, NOW he will finally understand why I react the way I do to certain things…PTSD aside!
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!
I am also going to link back to this on my blog. It is SO good!
Thanks! It’s good to know I am not alone. I am an extreme introvert and most of the time my family and acquaintances don’t get me. I hate it when they tell me to stop thinking too much; if I didn’t take time to process things, I think I’d go crazy with all the thoughts jumbled up in my head. Most of the time I feel alone and different. However I am lucky enough to have a few friends who accept me for who I am.
Thank you for posting this, it definitely makes me better about myself.
I must say Adam, when I read this it described my traits fairly spot on. I alway’s thought what I like and how I act around groups of people was pretty weird but this got me thinking. Later, I went to the docter and he told me I may be an introvert. It was odd but he told me all this stuff about introverts and when I asked him how he knew all this stuff he said he was an introvert too(:
I felt more comfortable reading this. Thanks :)
Adam, You have no idea (actually I’m sure you do) how happy I was to read this. I have grown up being the “quiet girl” If I had a burst of energy and had a moment where I was uncharacteristically silly, people said “why can’t you be this fun all the time?” I know how much it hurts to have people say “We would talk to you more if you would just make the initiative.” or once they heard me speak “wow, I always thought you were stuck up… but I guess ur just shy.”
Sometimes I would console myself by saying that someday I will be making something of myself and they will work for me. lol but seriously… I feel like this is almost a discrimination issue. At least it was for me growing up. Thanks for posting and thanks for proudly being “one of us” :)
All the points describe my life. People don’t understand that sometimes it’s nice to just sit home with a good book rather than constantly going out. (the only exception is art museums since they are quiet, awesome, and have great air conditioning lol) Also, I have always been buggered about making “small talk” since I find it useless. Making friends have been difficult growing up since my interests tend to be very different, but the friends I do have mean the world to me.
Thanks for blogging about this and showing introverts are not odd. :D
It is soooo good to finally know that being an introvert is natural and normal, even though it may not be the norm. I feel recognized and valued for who I am instead of wondering why I don’t react to and enjoy certain situations in the same way that most people do. Thank you!!
I was always asked wat i was thinking,y i wouldnt talk,y i dont come to b’days.I ve always like to stay alone,i usually avoid crowds.I end up making fool of myself in front of strangers.I am always referred as lost in my own thoughts.I didnt even knw before tat there are introverts,i thought i was odd.Thanks adam for letting me know i m not alone.I hav a bunch of frnds now ,all of them extroverts *sigh*.I am free talking with them on other topics but i cant share my feelings and thoughts with them,i m made fun of if i do share with them.Now i pour my feelings in poetry , stories or my beloved diary.THANKS ONCE AGAIN.
THANK U SO MUCH!!
This is the closest thing you can come to LIFECHANGING..! I cant stop reading it, and now i actually have printed it out (and saved t on my computer). I have to admit it is VERY tempting to send it to all of my teachers who have forced me to speak up and criticised me for simply beeing ME. I would also like to run around my home town (or the entire country), staple it on the light poles and every board I can find. This should be compulsory reading!!
Again, THAN U!!
This describes my life. Small talk is the most inane thing on the planet, and I am so full of angst that people never say what they think. It’s like people always say as much as this bit of dialogue in “The Pocket Muse”:
“How are you doing today, Bob? I don’t mean health wise, I mean spirit wise.”
“Well, I got a haircut today.”
My sister was reading this aloud to me and she kept getting annoyed by my shouts of agreement and many, many examples. I have to disagree with the “truth behind myth #7.” Being individualistic IS weird. I’m weird, you’re weird, and it’s absolutely magnificent!
I found this very comforting in a weird sort of way. I don’t ever find myself being discriminated against, but I do earn strange looks when my friends learn the TRUTH about my summer- That I spent the entire time shut away in my room decrypting song lyrics and sketching idly. I don’t understand people who hold the ability to be around people for so long. Even my closest friends, when they come over, leave me wishing for alone time after playing hostess for a while. I suppose people don’t understand why being with people makes me so exhausted, though.
At the end of the day, I don’t think it matters at all if you are a social butterfly or if you spend the day fantasizing. Introverts have misconceptions about extroverts and extroverts have misconceptions about us introverts. Even the most thoughtful cannot fully place themselves in a foreign truth. Therefore we will just have to be patient with one another.
I’m an introvert too… Nice post, Adam.. :)
i’m an introvert.. and sometimes i hate people and ordinary things, i need help, a lot of help to keep me steady, anyone please feel free to chat or email me , and adam i respect ur song, i like owl city, i like the way u compose ur song, but somehow i cant buy ur ticket in indonesia coz i hv financial problem right know and i really2 want to see ur gigz, looking forward for ur next album, stand up adam and make the world proud of u
Thanks a lot for sharing this with all of us you really know what you’re talking about! Bookmarked. Please also visit my site =). We could have a link exchange arrangement between us!
I am most certainly an introvert, but I think the last one is wrong. Skiing is the best part of my life. The adrenaline the rush of jumping off cliffs. Spinning and turning and having control and testing how long you can stay in control… It’s amazing. I never really had friends until I moved to a ski town. Now that I’m hear, I have realized that a lot of the people that move to such towns are also introverts… Music loving, nature loving, art loving, thrill seeking introverts.
LOL. After reading this, I think that I must be an introvert. It made much more sense in determining whether or not I’m an introvert when I read that part at the end about the connection between introvert-ness and rising IQs. Makes sense why I don’t like to start conversations with random people unless I have to/have something to say. It also makes sense why I know many people, but only a few of them are good friends to me, and that’s why I’m so close to my real friends and not as much with the people in my grade–let alone my school. It also makes sense why I enjoy thinking independently, while I also enjoy sharing my ideas with other people.
Long story short, thanks for explaining my entire life to me, Adam. LOL.
All of this describes me 100% accuretly. My mum sometimes yells at me for being some of the things listed on here, so i’ll just show her this. Thankyou for bringing this topic up, Adam. xx
This article is right on the money. I cannot disagree that I relate to each point made, yet it’s been relatively impossible to explain this to the extroverts throughout my life. It’s as if I can see them but they cannot see me.
I have Asperger Syndrome and I feel exactly this way. You and me both, brother.
Adam,
This post was a blessing! I am an introvert and I have been ridiculed as a result. This post made me laugh with relief. I hope that others will eventually see that introverts are as “cool” as everyone else. We are as much God’s creation as the extroverts.
Keep writing!
Livy
Search for recommendations from Citizens Assistance they will know which types are legit.
LOVE IT! That is so totally me. I love this post and I’m so relieved that it IS okay to be an Introvert! Made me feel so much more accepting of myself…
I always thought there was something wrong with me… I felt like I was being anti-social so for years I’ve been forcing myself into loud, crowded situations. A lot of my extroverted friends get annoyed with me because I don’t feel like going clubbing or to large parties. I feel socially fulfilled by spending time with close friends, and I eminently enjoy the time I can spend alone in order to process everything. The only problem is most people don’t understand this (me included until I read this), so I am afraid I will face the rest of my life faking who I am in order to feel accepted. Is there a way to love who I am without making others hate me for it?
I like people, I just don’t like wasting my time around people.
This article is true! Thanks for the two cents. : ) I will be blogging back to this in a couple of weeks.
Cheers!
What a thought provoking update, can I set it up so I receive an email whenever you make a fresh update?
When I read this I was like, hey wait, That’s so TRUE! I’m an introvert and this one is a blast.
“The messages of an Extrovert’s nervous system mostly bypass the Broca’s area in the frontal lobe, which is where a large portion of contemplation takes place.”
The BEST AND GREATEST way to insult somebody.
Haha I think every single Introvert in the world must have commented on/contributed to this blog entry, including yours truly. Someday, Introverts shall RULE THE WORLD! And we shall use our power to make it illegal for people to interrupt our contemplations and alone time. Then, our leader Mr. Adam Young shall shut himself in a room to make music. And the whole system will fall apart while our backs were turned, but it’s okay because meanwhile we all have a new album to listen to.
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Sometimes even I don’t know what I’m talking about.
This made my day, and I even learned some things about myself (being an introvert). Three days ago I didn’t even know what an introvert was!
I simply could not go away your website prior to suggesting that I really loved the standard information an individual provide for your visitors? Is going to be again ceaselessly to investigate cross-check new posts
I know I am an introvert, but I’m proud of it and I’m happy there are people that feel like me. This was a really interesting post that made me think a lot, thank you very much Adam :)
I am an Introvert and I am not afraid to admit it. Very nice post you have here. Lemme share this link to my twitter, thanks a lot Adam.
LOL, I have to say the on the web dating or electronic dating has come a very long way from the days of straight forward chat rooms. More and far more people are turning to on-line dating websites to display prospective dates.
LOL, I have to say the on the web dating or electronic dating has come a hell of a way since the days of simple chat rooms. A lot more and far more individuals are turning to on-line dating web sites to display likely dates.
LOL, I have to say the on-line dating or electronic dating has come a hell of a way from the days of straight forward chat rooms. Far more and much more people are turning to on the internet dating internet sites to display possible dates.
Video chat has now taken on line dating towards the next level and definitely produced it a safe choice to the regional club or bar scene.
Creating the best personal ad – Be appropriate – Stay away from poor language or sexual innuendo, many people will not be impressed with this and if they are, do you genuinely want to meet someone like that?
Tip for a Great personal ad – Produce Attraction – Do not just list everything you would like in somebody but go far more for highlighting your personal characteristics and personality. That way that you are far more likely to attract your true match as like attracts like.
Tip for a Great personal ad – Develop Attraction – Don’t just list every little thing you desire in an individual but go far more for highlighting your personal characteristics and personality. That way you might be a lot more likely to attract your accurate match as like attracts like.
Making a Great personal ad – Produce an attention grabbing headline – Stay away from the overused ‘SWF seeks SWM with GSH’, be diverse. Just before you post study other ad headlines and see what makes you take note and use these as a model, to write your own.
How to make a Great personal ad – Add a picture – Yes, find an excellent picture of your self, even the most gorgeous people can often appear terrible in a photo as most celebrities know only too nicely. But make sure it looks like you now, not ten years ago, be proud of who you might be and of course choose one in which you might be smiling.
Creating the best personal ad – Be appropriate – Stay away from bad language or sexual innuendo, most people won’t be impressed with this and if they’re, do you actually desire to meet someone like that?
For me, reading this is great reassurance that I am not the only crazy person out there. I was at a sign language class the other night (which, by the way is great because it was about 20 people all being silent for 2 hours) and the people wanted to make small talk with me. I didn’t understand why they needed to ask me random questions and have me reply with random answers which they probably won’t remember anyway, then ask them another random question! It makes very little sense…If you get me started on Harry Potter or music, however, I will talk for hours.
Wow. Those are so true. It gets so bothersome when people are constantly trying to tell me smile, talk, or whatever. I just have what my mom terms an “intense look”. And about the talking thing, I can’t shut up when I start talking to someone about something I’m really in to. But I agree with the list about seriously disliking small talk. I will say something when something needs to be said. I may not like parties and things that are mostly made up of conversation, however, I love trying new things, just not “talking more”. It’s who I am. But if you want me to ride a crazy roller-coaster, go cone-ing, or line-dance, I am all in. So don’t judge us. We are just humbly awesome. ;)
Well, I love introverts and am married to one. But something strange happened to the extrovert over time. As I got older I am definitely only a one-legged extrovert. Yeah, I can do the extroverted thing, but I get tired and it’s too loud and I am quite happy to come home and chilax. How much have I changed? I jumped at the chance to change from a hectic, noisy environment of the day shift to graveyard! Ahhh, now for some peace and quiet and room to think and I love it ;).
Ohhhhh I love U ADAM
I think being an extreme introvert is just as much as a compliment as being handsome…which you are
I hope that living in this messed up extroverted world doesn’t get to you. Thanks for understanding
That was great I have always regretted being an introvert.All the points you made are very true since they are all applicable to me.It was like reading a book on myself.It gave me a great insight that it was not a bad thing to be an intrvertNow I am going to ponder over what I have read and how I am going to adjust myself.But thanks all the same for showing nothing is lost on being an introvert.
This is totally me. Which makes sense why I connect with what you say. Other people I know say you’re weird, or random. But you make sense to me. I love being my introverted self, in fact I need it, and yearn for it. I can never go long without being with myself to process everything. I have a need not only to think through my actions, but to think through by beliefs, values, and thoughts. And I’m fine with that. I love it.
Introverts rule!!! I was quiet an Introvert but I somehow manage to get along with some extrovert. However I don’t find it really fun, it’s quite boring for me maybe because I’m a little out of place about their topic. I would rather sit alone and start daydreaming about flying and eating the clouds and sitting on the brightest star :) (It was my dream actually)
and i screamed YEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSS!!! when i saw this post!
there’s nothing wrong for being an introvert! it’s just the way we are! and it doesn’t mean that i’m an antisocial, i’m just like you said, enjoying my own thoughts. It’s them who think i’m weird for spacing out sometimes, thinking about gazzilion other things in my mind :/
Thank you for describe these introvert-thingy very well! :D
Reading this was akin to letting someone inside on my head. I think I have been grossly misunderstood because while I can talk and be social, I have always been an introvert. But because I do spend a substantial amount of time by myself (I’m a musician and writer) my friends have always wondered how I “could stand” to be alone. No problem. I especially related to this: “Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down.” 100% true and 100% me. I’ve never been able to successfully explain this to my mostly extroverted cohorts. Thank you for posting this and exposing it in a positive light.
Yeah i could be an introvert. It would be so cool to scream it out myself. Thanks Adam for this timely fact that people should be aware about. Introversion ~ that’s a positive thing… I love dreaming, I love daydreaming more… :D we rule the planet.
i am an infp according to the MBTI personality test (im curious to see what result you would get if you took it) so i am also an introvert. in fact i may be just as introverted as you are, im not sure. i think i have known about this for a year now and for that year i have felt so much better since finding out nothing is wrong with me.
what you wrote here seems to directly apply to infps, so i wonder are you an infp? i know i am and even before reading this i kinda figure that you are, you just seem like one to me :) we are quite a rare type, and its even rarer for my favorite signer to be the same personality type as me! wow as i read this i was like “that is exactly the way i am!” then i look over the poetry i had been writing and i find some parts here and there a bit similar to some of your songs too, and i wrote them long before i found out about you too. (btw im no good at poetry i just write to get my random thoughts out)
no wonder why i love your songs! we must have at least a similar way of thinking :) yeah im sure you’ll never read this, but i just thought i would comment just in case you do.
First-class Principle, although I would personally stay in possession to convey that given the throng of views it’s been with them really should be worth contemplating trying to better the spelling along with the english! Produced a powerfully good read though, excellent substance.
Wonderful post! Thanks so much for sharing it! A lot of times those who are introverts are also highly sensitive. This just means they have a more sensitive nervous system then others (about 15-20% of the population have this trait). Dr. Elaine Aron has published several books on the topic and has a self-test on her website: http://www.hsperson.com. I know for me, just realizing my nervous system is wired differently has made a huge difference! Maybe this could help with your insomnia? Many blessings to you and thanks for the inspirational music and writings you provide!
I just came across your blog today and have been skimming through your posts. This one caught my attention because I am an introvert (INFP for the Myers-Briggs folks out there.) All of your myths and your explanations are spot on. Your point about being alone (#6) and wanting to connect with one person at a time is so true.
Thanks for sharing here. Your writing carries a lot of depth and I admire your willingness to put yourself out there. I strive to get there with my own writing that’s for public consumption.
I’m a dating coach, and deal with this issue on a daily basis. It seems like guys seem they have to be outgoing or extroverted in order to be successful with women. Being outgoing may play a part in it, but it’s much more deeper than that. I really like what you’ve written about the subject, and would love it if you could take a minute and read what I’ve written on my latest blog at http://www.online-dating-mastery.com/?p=1687. –JT
WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?!? So I AM an Introvert?!? O_O
Because, my friends (well, my ”friends”. Because my only true friend is…my MP3. And my drum :3 I love you my drum ^^) (he (because I cannot think about my drum like a ”thing”) is bluuuue!!! Ahahah!) always think about me like an ”Extravert-Antisocial-Weirdo-Fairy-Unicorn’s-Lover-Rainbowful-Emo-Musical-Artistic-Not-Human-Girl-Maybe-An-Alien-Or-A-Zombie”. But I am an ”Introvert-Antisocial-Weirdo-Fairy-Unicorn’s-Lover-Rainbowful-Emo-Musical-Artistic-Not-Human-Girl-Maybe-An-Alien-Or-A-Zombie”??? Because your definition of an Introvert is a simple definition of…me! Ahahah! Like, I love to be alone, but when I have something to talk about, I would like to be with somebody to share with -_-” And I don’t talk to persons that I don’t want to talk with. Exemple (the first day of school, this year):
A girls comes with her friend. Their gang is beside, and they laugh at me. And they tell me: Hey, what’s your name?
-Stella.
-Ah…
They go. Then, after, I meet again them. -Hey! Hello!
-Goodbye.
-You’re not simpathetic!
-I know.
And that,s the end.
Wow, a few days ago my best friend made me a criticism that I should be more communicative, to continue the conversations, especially with strangers. When he told me this, I got it in my head for days because many people say to me that I am very quiet, shy, and it began to annoy me because I did not want to be. So, I look for more on this subject. And then I remembered you Adam. Because I am a fan of Owl City long ago, I read a lot about you consider yourself an introvert until I found a post about it on his blog. It was wonderful, helped me a lot, and when I saw you quoted The Introvert Advantage – Marti Olsen Laney, I simply looked at my bookshelf and there was this same book, I read it months ago and I did very well! Only we “our people” know how difficult it is to overcome our limits of communication, but also think that extroverts have to accept us and respect us, but we ourselves must first accept ourselves just so we can begin to evolve. Thank you Adam! Brazil loves you.
This blog made me feel like I know who I am and what my personality is.
Thank you so much for this, Adam. Being an introvert myself, and only just recently realizing it, this pretty much describes me. I lobey friends and family, and I’m very social when I’m talking about something I love, but being “on” all the time for people exhausts me. And, because I’m a teenage, being viewed harshly by others because of my tendencies can be very hard to deal with. I’m a nerd as well, and I’m quite proud to admit it, I’ve always been more fond of stories, movies, the arts and cultures than I have been with things like athletics, shopping, etc. I’m just not that kind of person.
I’m going to have to read this book. I think it’s kindof cool to be referred to as a “people”, like we’re our own race or something. :) Like some secretive club! :)
my self being an introvert can relate to each and every thing said….
I, like a few people above, am an adrenaline junky. Skydiving, check. Bungee jumping, check. Stock car driving, rock climbing, Sky jump in Vegas, check, check and check. However, I think the miss here is that we don’t do it to show off or to impress people. We do it for ourselves. I went bungee jumping by myself. I drove myself to the place, jumped and drove home. Skydiving, I took one of my buddies but I jumped by myself and really did it just for myself. I think that is the difference.
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I am married to an absolute introvert and it is at times extremely frustrating. I have learnt over the years how to handle certain senarios, but for the most I don’t understand his way of thinking at all!! He doesn’t talk when he’s unhappy or something is bothering him or stressed, I just need to somehow miraculously know this! He sleeps so much, and it feels that he is trying to avoid some responsibilities or he just doesn’t think of doing certain things. I have to constantly remind him of everything and always organise everything. This for me is very very tiring!!! This article did however shed some light on him.
first time read this blog, it just like “DAMN IT’S TRUE!!”
before i read this, i feel like an odd who can’t act normally like my friends did. but now i know that being an introvert isn’t that bad and we also have something special to be shown to others.. :)
Society has not got very much experience with people like me (seem like they’re always high but that is just our personality. I must admit though, being one of few always hyperactive people IS good as I’m never sad
Extroverts in front of the camera. Introverts doing the editing. Makes sense, we can’t all be famous. The world is only half a stage. The rest are in the audience.
Thank you so much for sharing this!! I totally agree with everything… except I do like to go to parties and stuff, but definitely couldn’t do it every week like some people do! It’s true, I need time to “recharge” haha. People seem to think I hate them because i’m quiet, but if they started a conversation with me hey! I can talk!
it always so nice to have such a large number of people reaffirm these basic ideas. my friend/roommate is an extrovert and a needy(not meant to be judgmental just observational) one at that. she use to knock on door to chat about the most inane(that was kinda of judgmental…sorry) things every couple of minutes, and i would always have to find a way to kindly exit the conversation. eventually it just became so draining that i had to sit her down and explain that i am an introvert and as much as i love her she needs to give me more alone time,….since then shes been a little better still not ideal but i suppose if she can try to accommodate my need for peace i can try to give her a little more social time.
Wow, that’s got to be one of the BEST BLOG POSTS EVER. DEAD ON. I feel like no one has ever described me better.
Is it a problem if i don’t want to be an introvert? Or if these points don’t even describe me in the first place. Like for example, I do want to talk for no reason, and hang out long hours and not be so uncomfortable with the thought of not being able to be as socialable as some others.
oh my fucking shit I say “YES YES” to everything!!!!
I don’t believe in introverts and extroverts.
I believe that everyone is a bit of both.
Still… This makes me want to change my mind…
I sound a lot like this.
I don’t know why…
Thanks for posting, Adam! I can really relate to this. I’m definitely an introvert!
Reposting this on Soup… cuz EVERYONE needs to know.
this is soo unnaturally,unbelievably me…. ! Although bein a student of psychology I knw that a majority of individuals r ambiverts.. havin traits of both. And u can’t and shouldn’t try to change ur core personality, no matter wht!
This is why the whole life has been so difficult. Dammit.
constantly a large enthusiast of connecting in order to blog owners that i love but don’t obtain lots of link really like from.
You really put my feelings in black and white for everyone to see. Get out of my head!!
Despite a life spent in study and problem solving, and earning a living doing it, I still find, of all my interests, people are the most compelling subject. Not as subjects for my curiosity, but for interacting with in all the ways that we most enjoy. Weird ? Well, if being an introvert is one of the flavours that makes up the soup of humaness, then I am totally happy with it. We may not be the loudest, spiciest, most colourful flavour, but we are sublime, subtle, enigmatic and essential to the mix.
Thank you for this great summary! Everyone loves to be understood, and I am grateful my wonderful extrovert friend saw this and sent it to me. I am printing it right now for my Very Extroverted Husband.
Hi,
I know that I am an introvert. I like this post of yours for one reason that it shows introversion in a very positive way, and I like that. To Support myself, to be happy with my introversion always, from now on, may be i will be coming back to your post , now and then.
Thank you.
From one introvert to another – thank you. I’ve got a copy of ‘The Introvert Advantage’. Great book- I highly recommend it.
Thank you. This is insightful :) It’s been a while since I’ve read something interesting, last one was my re-reading of Atlas Shrugged
Thank, you so much this has helped me understand myself better.People would always ask me why I wouldn’t talk, and that used to bug me.
Again I say thank you because this has helped me in so many ways. :)
I’ve always felt very defensive when people call me out on my “quietness”. I think because I hate being compartmentalized as shy. It frustrated me today, for example, when a new co-worker said I was quiet even though we had talked several times to eachother and I felt like I was “engaging”. I feel like I hide it well sometimes, but like this shows, it’s exhausting to do that! And apparently I don’t hide it as well as I thought I did! Haha! But I mostly get mad when someone says it like a bad thing and those people are usually the extra-extrovert kind of people who call out everyone for everything. I can atleast realize that it’s not me who should feel attacked but I should be the one to take it in stride and try to explain that me being quieter than them is not a bad thing and shouldn’t be treated as such.
I feel when people are like you ,you feel less uncomfortable.So you behave like an introvert only when you are in a bunch of people who are drastically opposite to you and they won’t appreciate your thoughts.It’s the natural thing to do.And it quite explains why geniuses,rational thinkers and odd one outs behave that way.
Great article! As a person who has majored on personalities and disordered personalities, you shed light for the introvert who believes they are somehow weird or strange. As some of the literature states, Introversion is a preference. Not that we cannot do extroverted things, but we tend to become tired with those who are so extroverted. I’ve always said that to send an introverted kid to their room is not punishment. It’s a blessing. Real punishment would be made to sit out with the rest of the extroverts and listen to them blabber on… :)
I’m an ENFP but others think I’m introvert. *rolleyes*.
#1 is true. I can get introverts talk and when they start, they talk more than I do. haha!
I am a fixed introverted. When I was a child I was quite content to play by myself for hours. I learned how to interact with people and enjoy myself without shutting down.
I am married to an introvert, who was very sheltered growing up. As a result he does not like people or going out in public. Also I am quite certain many high IQ people are also extroverts. Not all extroverts short circuit the frontal lope before acting and speaking. You make them all should like monkeys or cave men.
In this crowded world, you either have to learn how to tune out some back ground sounds and stimuli or you will just burn out. OR you can just keep making excuses and hide. If your happy with that.
I felt like standing up and shouting “YES” too. I’m greatly tempted to print this out and distribute it to my friends so that they can understand me. Thanks, Adam.
These are good points.Actually already i know that iam an Introvert.I know that by seeing some other site like this before many days.Sure like some other Introverts, the people around me didn’t understand me and i never cared about it coz iam special for me.I can’t able to find another introvert where i live.Its very difficult.So just using pc in my free time.
BLESS THIS POST. Adam, you don’t know how much this helped me when I first read it. I think since I read this I finally accepted myself as an Introvert and started loving me the way I really was. Thank you :)
I’ve always considered myself as extrovert, but after reading this I really had to give it a second thought. Every point you describe depicts me very well. I’ll translate this post into Indonesian and post it in my own blog, of course with reference to this post as the original article.
hi!,I love your writing so a lot! share we keep in touch more about your article on AOL? I need an expert in this area to resolve my problem. Maybe that’s you! Taking a look forward to peer you.
story of my life … IT MAKE SENSE!!!! Thank you so much for sharing this, Adam! It sheds some light on life for me and makes me superproud to be an introvert! <3
Thank you. This made me feel so special. I used to think I was just a weird person. I found a description of myself in that list. Some of my friends say that I can never stop talking, while others say that I’m always to myself. Also, when I’m in a place where there’s so much noise and so many people (extroverts), I become very exausted.
Thank you Adam for sharing this. It’s so cool to know that such an amazing person like you is also an introvert.
Not all introverts think the way you posted. The book you are reading is very vague and only talking about a certain type of introvert. If you want to read about types more in depth you need to read David Keirsey’s book: Please Understand Me Part II and Myers Briggs books and take the Myers Briggs Temperament Indicator. Being an INFP, I extremely believe that is your type also. I’ve come to the conclusion that there are many intuitives in this world but not very many extreme intuitives. What I mean by that is there isn’t many that think very deeply and are so absorbed inside themselves in their own little world thinking of utopias and new ideas that they almost forget reality. Then when they realize reality it’s like being knocked to the ground. This world is reality based and the majority of people, 75% are Sensors. Sensors go by everything in reality, they cannot think abstractly and they can’t understand new concepts. The two Sensor Core types are SJ and SP. SJ or Sensor Judging types stick to what they have always done and never change while the SP or Sensor Probing types are constantly on the look out for a new exciting adventure. Not an adventure in the mind, but like sky diving and anything that makes adrenaline rush. The SJ and SP type are the ones that make up 75% of the population. The other core types are the Intuitives the NF and NT. NFs are Intutive Feelers. We yearn for peace between everyone and, especially the INFP type, can be very religious and has set morals. NTs are rational and logical. They think abrstractly like the NF but they aren’t involved in the humanities like the NF. Describing NTs and NFs is harder than describing an SP or SJ. Sad to say but NTs and NFs work in a more complicated manner than an SP or SJ. They can also understand an SP or SJ from the inside out. While an NF and an NT to an SP or SJ is overwhelming and even weird.
To go into more depth the types are:
ISFJ, ESFJ, ISTJ, ESTJ (These are the SJ or Guardians)
ISFP, ESFP, ISTP, ESTP. (These are the SP or Artisans)
INFJ, ENFJ, INFP, ENFP. (These are the NF or Idealists)
INTJ, ENTJ, INTP, ENTP. (These are the NT or Rationals)
The letters stand for:
I= Introverted
E= Extroverted
S= Sensing
N= Intuitive
J= Judging
P= Perceiving
Introverted Sensing types are quite and reserved observes of the reality around them, but an Introverted Intuitive is quite and reserved but is constantly introspecting. They are always based inside themselves and are always non reality based. Thinking of new ideas or concepts.
Extraverted Sensing and Extraverted Intuitives are pretty similar. They love to socialize and be with others.
Sensors are Concrete and Reality based while Intuitives are Abstract and Non-Reality based.
INs are usually smarter than ENs because INs like to introspect and gather data and create concepts and theories. Don’t get me wrong ENs like to do that also but the fact that they love to socialize can deprive their N and make them unlikely to think to the depths of an IN.
Judging and Perceiving in the Sensor and Intuitive types is very different.
Judger Sensors follow Authority and that authority sets the boundaries for them and for that reason SJ types aren’t open minded to new concepts or new ways of doing things. They are very conventional.
Judger Intuitive Feelers are actually quite messy when it comes to the layout of their desk or the clothes thrown around their room. But they are very routinized in their everyday life. They don’t like to on the whim go somewhere new. For them it has to be the right moment and time.
Judger Intuitive Thinkers are incredibly organized, both in the world around them and internally. They are always calm and collected at all times. They are able to take abstract ideas and fit them into their master plan in a way that other types can’t.
Perceiver Sensors are all about having a good time. They are the type constantly seeking new things that bring physical pleasure. They are all about the here and now and always seeking that next physical rush at whatever cost.
Perceiver Intuitives Perceiving is extremely different than the Sensors Perceiving. NPs are open to all new possibilities and ideas, but an INP is introspective and adding to their catalog of theories and ideas and a ENP is hindered for the fact that they want to socialize. INPs are more likely to gather information than an ENP.
Me being an INFP they are only 1% or less of the population and Intuitives are 25% of the population. Also, don’t be fooled by the many that claim to be NT or NF. A majority test incorrectly because they test out to be who they wish they were. Also if you can’t talk about the things you imagine in your mind or your ideas on the universe and how we got here then they probably aren’t intuitive or if they are they are watered down by society. Sadly it is hard to relate to the majority.
Amen, brother! I think the overly socialized world is desperately in need to the introvert’s perspective. Hermit Power!!
I read this like, everyday since the day you posted it. I think it makes me fell like I’m not alone.
I love this. Everyone said I was rude and shy and should make more friends. They said I was weird and I agree. But I would rather be that way :)
I am a border line introvert When I get tired of being alone in my own fantastic world of ‘me’I go out with a couple friends. When I get out in 5 minutes i’m ready to go.
I’ve seriously never read anything that offered me more insight into who I am as a human being than this simple little list. Growing up an introvert I was often made to feel it was somehow “wrong” for me to be that way and I think I took that with me later in life. Thank you for passing it on, it’s funny how you can greatly affect people through the simplest gestures–like posting a list online :) Definitely gave me food for thought.
I like how you capitalized “Introvert” like it’s a word of great importance (which it is here) :D
I’m away from home right now, staying at a very noisy and extrovert dominated backpackers. There are hundreds of people here. I have been socializing but I’m finding it exhausting so I’ve been retreating away from people wondering why I’m not like every one else. I seem to forget sometimes that I really am introverted. Which is why I’m looking it up on the Internet. So thank you for your honest words Carl. I’m studying film making and I enjoy my inner and outer creative world. I don’t really dislike being introverted, I just seem to get seduced sometimes by the extroverted!
Hmmmm. If I were smarter or even just more passionate I would pin myself as an introvert.
[...] But that’s only because I need mental energy to do this, what I love. I know I’m an introvert, and I’m proud to be counted among their ranks. But that means my life is a little more [...]
I feel like this explained my life, wish everyone could just read this and finally understand why not only me but a lot of people out there are the way they are. I’m especially having trouble with this now as a collage freshman and in a serious relation. I really just feel like i have nothing to say and people sometimes get angry cuz of it. I just wish they knew it was not my fault.
I read the same book when I was maybe 13 or 14. It rocked my world. Completely changed my perspective on life, and gave me a huge confidence boost. Now I don’t feel guilty about being the way I am. And I don’t take it as personally when extroverts seem to ignore me (because they probably aren’t, or not on purpose). I no longer am afraid to say no or speak up or to apologize for the way I am.
It was this book and a series of sermons the pastors at my church did that kick started a huge investigation into introversion, extroversion, and personalities. I’ve learned a lot about who I am, who my friends and family are, what I need from people in my life, and how to ask for it. I’ve also begun to realize the kind of people I want and need in my life. It’s led to major changes, and a much healthier life.
I found a book on temperaments which helped me understand my introverted personality & the personalities of my family members and the weird things they do.Its called “Why you act the way you do” by Tim LaHaye.There are 4 major temperaments of people.Two are introverted ( the melancholy & the phlegmatic) and 2 are extroverted ( sanguene & choleric).I am very introverted,and I am Melancholy.We are born with them,so we are that temperament all our life.Check it out.Google it.
I had always wondered why I was more quiet and a little bit more “in-depth” with myself than most people I know! :) I am glad to discover that I am an introvert!
This article was very interesting, after reading this it made me understand why working with the public for all of twenty nine yrs was so exhausting to me and why I couldnt leave the house on my day off!!! Thank you!!
Thank you! Now, if only I can get at least some of the life-force suckers to read and accept it, maybe I wouldn’t want to run away to some deserted island just to rest.
Glad to see that I am not alone. Crazy how this describes me more so than anything I’ve ever read. Better then any horoscope out there. Maybe this should be an astrological sign. I think all introverts here commenting should put there interests down as to further who we are as a collective. I shall divulge that I am a musician. However, not just any musician, but one that seeks to create tonality based on my inner thoughts and emotions. I do not seek play others music unless I seek techniques to describe my own pattern of thought. I also study programming and math.
I am so glad to see I am not alone as an introvert in this extraverted world of ours. I’ve just come to the realization (at age 43) of who I am, and for the longest time have felt like I have some kind of “mental defect” when it came to social interactions and other issues. Ironically, I work in customer service and worked retail for at least 20 years, which is unusual for introverts I think, and have found myself feeling constantly overwhelmed dealing with issues and the fast paced enviornment that becomes a challenge to someone who’s not much of a multitasker. With this knowledge in mind, I’m trying to look for a career that suits my trait. I am open to any suggestions by anyone who is also introverted like myself.
Thanks for the help. Now I have no reason to feel bad about myself.
So, uh, you give a list of “myths” and then have a paragraph under each one explaining that it’s actually true, and then going into details about how and why it’s true?
OMG YOU CAN READ MY MIND!!!!
[...] I could truly relate to. And one day, I stumbled across an entry on his online blog called 10 Myths About Introverts. Everything I read was ringing “this is so [...]
Yes, most people told me that I’m rude and snobbish and i’m always find it difficult to explain to them of such situations..
I was surprised at how many items on this list applied to me…whoah.
The funny thing is, I’m a double major in Spanish and Radio, so I enjoy talking, and being heard (I have so much information built up inside that I feel like sharing it with other people, like valuable treasure)…I wish I had known more about being an Introvert earlier in my life. One of the things I have trouble with is just speaking out, being bold when I know I need to be. I always feel like I need permission to talk about something, to be invited in. I will definitely be doing more research on us in the future!
Don’t you think it’s funny how the comments don’t go on for more than long after the blog entry?
very true and interesting. i wish everyone on this world reads this..
Hi,
I’m so glad you wrote this. I feel so much better about not being so talkative. I’m a huge introvert. I’ve been quite for as long as I can remember. when me and my family watch home videos and I come on all I do is walk around with eyes as wide a saucers. Anyways, love your blog! Keep writing! You rock!
Hi,
I’m so glad you wrote this. I feel so much better about not being so talkative. I’m a huge introvert. I’ve been quite for as long as I can remember. when me and my family watch home videos and I come on all I do is walk around with eyes as wide a saucers. Anyways, love your blog! Keep writing!
I’m so glad you wrote this. I feel so much better about not being so talkative. I’m a huge introvert. I’ve been quite for as long as I can remember. when me and my family watch home videos and I come on all I do is walk around with eyes as wide a saucers. Anyways, love your blog! Keep writing!
I love this! This is completely me. It’s so good to see this, everyone needs to read it, right?
I am defiantly showing my extraverted friends this…it is like this blog was written about me! Finally someone understands! Sweet manna from heaven….
Really interesting thanks – I have been told since I was a child that I’m shy and so I’ve always believed it. BUT I do like company, conversation etc and get lonely without it, I can be quite confident in my opinions although I’m always interested in what others have to say…. So it could all be about dopamine? Very interesting.
I don’t come across as rude – quite the converse, manners really matter to me and I can do small talk although I much prefer ‘real’ and ‘honest’ conversations about what I care about.
One last thing – friends – yes as the article says I can count them on one hand & I’m 100% loyal, there for life. Very much quality not quantity.
This just made me feel so much better. I just got into a fight with my gf of 2 and a half years cause its Friday night and I don’t want to go out to the bar with her and her work friends. I got defensive and said I’m 26, I don’t need to be at the bar to have fun. She ended up taking offense and said that she just wanted to have some fun with me. And I feel so helpless cause I do want to have fun with her too, I just don’t consider spending time at a bar with people I don’t really care about to be fun. But I guess I could get to know them, but I don’t have that desire. Okay I was feeling better but now as I’m explaining the situation I still feel like there’s something wrong with me for not wanting to go out!! argggh help!! and now she’s out with her best friend and her best friends older man friend and I bet they’re just talking about how lame it is that I didn’t want to go out on a Friday night.
I was just recently googling the word introvert and on the second page on google, there i see your blog. I actually just read this article online before I read your blog. But anyway, while I was reading this stuff I actually started crying. My parents as well as basically everyone I know think there is something wrong with me, particularly depression. But I’m not depressed. I’ve felt alot of stress lately(althouh I didn’t know it) because of the pressure to be an extrovert and the idea that the traits of introverts are wrong. So It felt really, really amazing to read those articles, and then I find your blog and it makes me feel even better to know that someone really talented and respected is also an introvert. It kind of makes me feel like I may also someday amount to something. But anyway, I’ve certainly written enough, and I’m guessing no one really wants to read this comment very badly, so without further ado, God bless you Adam and all the other introverts in the world.
I eat owls for breakfast.
Hi,
Thanks a lot
Its really nice to know these facts..as I used to be one long ago…its like revisiting the past…I loved your interpretations, Adam… :)
Thank You so much for this! I absolutely hate small talk and get way overstimulated if I’m around too many people (especially small-talkers) for very long.
Introversion has been a “problem” for me only to the extent that I’ve allowed “society’s” view of quiet, thoughtful people to affect me.
However, I now declare and demand of myself that I stop judging me! What else would be possible if I stopped judging myself for just one day? What else could show up?
Until, today when I heard the author of ‘Quite’, on TEDdotcom Susan Cain speak on “The power of introverts”; I had come to accept myself as weird that I was not content with the status quo especially in regards to social injustice to humanity and it ate my core that there was nothing I could do about it … now I understand differently. Thank you for this post.
.
Wow! Thank you so much Adam! This really gives me a whole new perspective on introverts! It’s a very benevolent view on them. Keep up the good work Adam!
Speaking as someone who is often labeled as an introvert, which can be very tiresome since it comes from my parents as well, I actually disagree with number 10. I wouldn’t call becoming an extrovert “fixing yourself,” but it’s definitely possible. I also believe the reason for being an introvert is developed through youth, and gets harder to change the longer you are one, due to feelings of abnormality and simply not developing social skills as fast as others who spend more time practicing. My older brother and I spent a lot of time together when we were young and he ended up doing most of the talking with his quick and witty personality, and i got used to be more of a listener than anything else. As a result, I went through middle school somewhat lost in other people’s interactions, and for three years I was a bystander who rarely participated or talked among an all boy group that got in trouble a lot, and I was content enjoying myself at home more than at school. Right now, however, in college, I am fairly extroverted after putting much effort and thought into social interactions through high school, tired of being labeled as shy, introverted, and sometimes miserable. As I have been getting more used to an extroverted lifestyle, I enjoy being out and about, working with friends, and publicly making a fool out of myself. It is very interesting analyzing myself because I acknowledge how it really does change the way you think. Right now I am working on trying to become more comfortable transitioning between being introverted and extroverted because I sometimes miss being able to day dream for full days at a time, without any hint of loneliness. My point is similar sounding to many motivational speeches, which is that you can be what you whatever and whoever you want, as long as you’re willing to change and you don’t let others’ labels get in your way.
“Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.
Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.”
So what you’re saying is… yes, they ARE weird.
“Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.”
So what you’re saying is… yes, they ARE aloof nerds.
Nice to see a rusty metal sign saying CONFIRMED land on these two.
Dude, THANK YOU for this list. It really made a good read and if the book which you read really comes down to brass science I feel more confident that this will be more noticed. I can very much see myself in all these bulletpoint you’ve listed and couldn’t agree more. Reasuring to have likeminded people around. As a teenager I felt an almost compulsory demand to dumb myself down, something which I’ve gotten over but really should’ve embraced earlier. It all comes down to getting to know yourself and how you comfortably react and feel I suppose. I’m a 22 year old guy, and since I subjugated thinking for myself I grew more confident in my behavior and embracing my quirks and idiosyncrasies. I took an IQ test and realized “goddamn I got into Mensa? what the hell?”. So in summary I guess we’ve just all got to stick up for ourselves and realize that there’s nothing dangerous in being an individual; half the people on earth are just on the bandwagon anyhow, where’s the fun in that? Seems kinda bland to me. Though embracing a balance with being able to be a little extroverted at times is only healthy I think, as practicing conversation builds up a very useful skill; though I still have trouble when speaking to people when all of the attention is on me, feel kinda overloaded and like I don’t have anything really interesting or witty to say and can someone PLEASE take the spotlight haha :S I also recommend reading Wikipedia’s article on Eccentricity (Behavior), got to know myself a little better by reading that. I can’t quite textualize how great reading this article was, so much mutual understanding! Once again, thank you and keep up the god work!
ops… good*** =)
This is an absolutely ridiculous post, sub categorizing an ‘introverted’ personality into a ‘species’ of human is nonsense. There is no need for this sense of justification or rationalisation of what is essentially very subjective in nature. As is mentioned quite rightly in the comments folliowing this post, a healthy balance of both characteristics is essential for a more rounded sense of personal and professional ‘success’, Read more literature on ‘Emotianal intellegence’ to understand why.
Hi Everyone!
Bit late jumping in here, but I just wanted to mention an easy way to know if you are an introvert or extrovert as some of you are finding it hard to make your mind up. :)
If you `recharge` with alone time and find that people `tire` you out quickly when you are in company then you are likely Introverted.
If you get `recharged` and `buzzed` in company and don’t like so much alone time you are extroverted.
I am a fairly extreme introvert and am grouped in one of the rarer personality types (see Kiersey/Jung or Myers Biggs). I can deal with company as I have learned strategies over the years that allow me to cope with company but still prefer one to one and smaller groups of people that I know well.
I am amazed, thank you for speaking the truth. I have struggled all my life thinking I was extrovert, than found out I am not. I came from a large, loud family and thought that was how I was supposed to be. I had so much external stimulation, I felt like something was wrong with me. I recently went back to school and did some personality testing and some deep soul searching to find out what was “wrong” with me. After eliminating some of the business in my life for my studies, I discovered that I prefer smaller, intimate settings rather than loud, crowded ones and I love to write. This discovery has generated peace within me and I now understand myself. Thank you again for posting.
This defines me to a POINT. Except for the no-adreniline-junkie part. I love roller coasters to death! lol
Wow. This pretty much defines my entire personality. I never thought I’d see it explained so well. Good to know I’m not the only ‘weird’ person on this planet ;)
Like Tara said, I recharge when I’m alone. I like people, but I can’t have them around me all day. I like being alone with my thoughts. I daydream a lot.
Adam, it seems you and I are very much alike :) as are a lot of other people who left reactions behind on this blog post, it seems.
Excuse me if my English isn’t always correct, it’s not my native language.
This list of myths came to me like diamonds would come if they suddenly appeared in my pocket. I can count my friends using only one finger, because she’s actually the only friend I have. It’s immensely painful living so far away from her and not being able to speak her language properly. It takes me years to make friends but they all go away because they think I’m not interested in them as a common friend would.
God bless you.
So True, it seems like you’ve read my mind, and that liked me!! hehehe!!! :D it’s so good to think that I’m not anormal! I’m just DIFFERENT!
very true…….. i have also experienced these things with me….
I love you, dear brother! Thank you million times! I have just come from a social event charged with feelings of guilt, stupidity and no self-esteem. As if I were an eerie, idiot woman amidst plenty of delighting, smart people. The idea that the others expect me to chat and chat and chat forever about any subject they propose is always intimidating me, suggesting that I’d be a fool. Which, modestly speaking, is not the case, after all. I’ve been afraid of admitting that I’m an introvert because, just as you precisely wrote, everyone’s misconception is that introversion is an emotional or psychical condition, just as shyness. It takes an extrovert much intelligence to realize how much more valuable an introvert may be in his/her profoundness. I’ll bookmark this article to read it every time I feel odd about myself. Thank you once more!
arrr very agree >.<
In a society wHere extroverts are the norm, I confirm half the time to an extrovert way. But I always did prefer loads better time alone :D I’m proud to be an introvert! I think wonders because I allow myself time to think, I don’t surround myself with crowds :D PS I’m not shy, brah…. I just have nothing to say.
I feel as though I just read my shrink’s notes…I don’t have one, just saying :)
All these points really struck a cord with me but #9 particularly hit me because of my up in coming weekend. It seems everyone I know needs a “thrilling” weekend full of adrenaline in order to have a good time, i.e. snowboarding, dirt bike riding, car races, and getting piss drunk. I feel like the old man of the group who would be just as content hiking mountain trails discussing politics and philosophy…it’s not “thrilling” but it’s much more meaningful which is what I constantly seek….meaning. Thanks for the list man, I am officially an introvert haha.
Wow, this is amazing, i looked on the web if there was something wrong with me for not being so outoing and talkative, and stumbled on this, i love art and i make music, keep to myself and hardly see friends, i thought i might be in a depression or somethin, i dont smile much but this pins my personality down to a tea, im jus glad that im not as, ‘ab-normal’ as i percieve myself.. thanks for this
Great topic, thanks for taking such good care of this website!
That is the appropriate blog for anybody who needs to seek out out about this topic. You realize so much its almost hard to argue with you (not that I truly would need…HaHa). You definitely put a brand new spin on a topic thats been written about for years. Great stuff, simply great!
I agree with this so much, some people call me deaf, it’s just that concentrating on what one person is saying when there is a lot going on is too exhausting. yay, go introverts!
Thank you so much!!!!! I saw this article a year ago and had never even considered what “Introverts” were. When I read this article, something inside me clicked. I wondered if maybe I was one. Anyway, since then, i bought The Introvert Advantage and have read it many times and am in love with the idea of Introvertism. I love being one, and I’m so glad this explain why i love being alone! Now I just need to explain this to my friends :) thanks!
It’s weird how I see myself as weird. Cool to know I’m not the only one who’s stereotyped as weird, aloof, lonely… It’s basically a real advantage.. and I love it.
That statement ”The burden is not entirely on Introverts to try and become “normal.” Extroverts need to recognize and respect us, and we also need to respect ourselves”…
….just made my day…it took me 3 years to realise that it is ok for me me to be different from the rest of the people in my college(extroverts mainly)..I just regret why i tried to change myself and failed everytime i tried…
….just wanted to know….does any one here think that i shud actually try an give an explaination for my ”wierd” behaviour to a colleague who does not understand me??
Myth 9,7,5,4,2,1 all discribe how i am and, exspecaily 6 right down down to the point. I stumbled across this and freaked me out i didnt no their was a name for how i acted go introverts <3
guys..can someone please tell me if i should give an explaination for my ”unique/strange/wierd behaviour to people who fail to understand me on their own?
I agree with this, for myself Im more interested in visual things then talk
Great job at Owl City Blog. Myth Busting has such a good feel to it. In my case I have recently discovered that I must be introverted, and it feels so right. I can mix in my social groups but need to escape as soon as practical. Others might take heart to find out there are two links on my website which suggests that introverts make great leaders … http://www.learningalways.com It sure does make a lot of sense. For instance, introverts can absorb a lot of information before sprouting some “half baked” idea. And can listen, really listen in the collaborative setting.
…. er sorry, my sentence structure needs correcting. I was really trying to say, introverts can absorb a lot of information and will think clearly; unlike a lot of extraverts who don’t stop to think, and come up with … some “half baked” idea. Cheers
I am absolutely talkative, energetic and outgoing when I’m with people I’m comfortable with, so I never considered myself an introvert. Yet after reading this, I felt that I am one. Everything written above fits me like a glove. If I am sitting alone, I could ponder for hours over the smallest matter, not needing a companion. But I do think that the feeling one gets while confiding matters that are close to your heart to someone who they really trust is heartwarming. I’d gladly trade a group of ‘followers’ for one true and loyal friend. I have always been termed as the quiet bookworm, and people simply assume that I don’t like talking. But on a subject that interests me, I could rant on for hours and hours, like about your music. I love talking :D
I extremely despise when I’m labelled, when people think they know all there is to me. I’m an individual with my opinions and ideas, an they do not know them better than I do. I’ll admit I’m a bit on the wild side, but I can be serious and meaningful, and I deserve to be taken seriously. I find pleasure in things that most people don’t, like reading a random old blog post and leaving a long comment.
Usually I am so much more comfortable with online chatting then face to face conversations, because I feel I can type or write my thoughts in a clearer and wiser way then say them.
GO INTROVERTS, INDEED!
i was feeling really down until i read this i have been trying to get out of the quiet girl label for the longest i get talkative about topics i find interesting then for a while i will just shut down and not talk. this is at work where everyone is loud and outgoing.i feel like once people get to know me they just don’t want to hang with me or they forget about me because i’m so quiet then i just thought maybe i need to find more people like me ,but thats hard i don’t know where to meet other introverts. it just makes me mad cause i like what am i doing wrong everyone keeps saying you talk so low ,you never say anything ,stop being so quiet. i talk just not a lot or loud . been letting all this stuff get to me all my associates keep ditching me to hang out with people that are more exciting or loud. and no one takes the time to get to know me i’m always being friendly to everyone else !
You are a real blessing to many of us. Thank you for posting the information you learned. It has taken me almost 60 years to feel truly comfortable in who I am, as I am. Being an introvert is a beautiful way to be. My husband read me a short article a few months ago on this similar information. You have so much more, and I am going to share it with him. But, in just these two articles, I feel even better about who I am. I like myself and getting rid of lots of years of guilt for not living up to what others think I should be like….like “them”. I don’t want to be like “them”. I like being “ME”! :-) I appreciate “YOU”!
Dear Adam
I know you most likely won’t read this but you gotta try. Right?
I’m 12 yrs. old and because of this i now know how much of an introvert I really am. In July of last year I was waiting to do something and these two girls came up to me and asked if they could come with me, and we’ve been best friends since. But if they haden’t have walked up to me I would never have given them a second look. And most of the time when I’m at like a potluck I’m normally quiet because alot of people are around me so I just shut down. And there are many more other things but I won’t list them. I love your music, and your a role model for people like us. So thank you sir. For introverts everywhere thank you.
your fan
-amy
This define my entire life.
Thank you so much.
Yes I suffer from the fact that I’m not normal and I try to fit into the extrovert world by denying my introvert existence. God, I go through it everyday and ask myself, what’s wrong with you? Why can’t you just be normal. And every time I come back from an outing or late night with friends, I always like to think through what happened and process it. I never knew I was subconsciously recharging! Like man, this is gold. I wish I found this sooner. Oh why can’t the society learn to handle us better rather than label us as the quiet, shy person. It’s annoying as hell living your life in denial just to fit in with the normal people. Like wow, what i’m reading is just amazing.
And this just blew me, “Extroverts need to recognize and respect us, and we also need to respect ourselves.”
Sometimes you don’t realize it, but deep down inside I might just be beating myself too much.
Thanks a million.
1.I love that book.
2.Thankyou so much for putting this up here. Now when I need to explain to someone what exactly an introvert is and why we are like we are, I can send them here. :)
Spot on with this write-up, I actually assume this website needs much more consideration. I’ll probably be once more to learn way more, thanks for that info.
It seems Adam has lots of introvert fans (myself included) :P
yes yes YES!
to the one with introverts being shy, once i was in my sophomore English class and i had to talk about the biggest greenhouse in the world ” which is in Brazil i believe.
i wouldn’t shut up about it in the class, everyone mouth’s went wide open in shock when i was presenting to the class, and whenever i get started about cooking i wont shut up. i love talking about cooking, books, songs, and other things too. but i hate it when people talk about trend or meeting up at a party next Friday. i went to a party once WAY OUT OF MY ELEMENT!
i love staying at home and write, drinking a fresh cup of coffee in one hand and a lady finger in the other.
i only have 2 friends, so yes i can count them on one hand hehe.
it takes a lot to be my friend. i cherish every single one of them, and i knew it about the IQ thing! my father and i have many conversations about the world and he flat out told me one day that he thought i was a really smart girl, and he said that’s a lot coming from him.
Introverts unite! I totally fit the description, I just never thought of myself as an introvert before. I’ll have to find more info. All of my spare time is spent reading, writing, listening to music, and thinking. My family jokes that you could lock me in a room with nothing to do for a m
Introverts unite! I totally fit the description, I just never thought of myself as an introvert before. I’ll have to find more info. All of my spare time is spent reading, writing, listening to music, and thinking. My family jokes that you could lock me in a room with nothing to do for a month and when you let me out I would be perfectly content. Introverts aren’t weird, we’re just US!
Forever thanks,
Michela
Great article! Thanks for writing it!
I think this YouTube video was hilarious but also be quite helpful to send to my friends so that they would understand me better without my being too pedantic.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pmf4T1J3rhk&feature=youtu.be
Absolutely every point fits me. I hate the way people label you lonely just because you like to spend a lot of time alone… most people just compare other people to their own preferences, instead of thinking outside the box. Its there bad taht they cant spend a minute alone, i’d hate to be like that.
I am so happy to have read this article. I actually cut my family off because they kept labelling me “weird” and “quiet” when I just had the characteristics of an introvert. At the age of 27, I am finally comfortable with me being me.